


To Our Castle Made of Sand

by joouheika



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gang Rape, Happy Birthday Zeke!, Horror, Incest, M/M, Major Spoilers, Psychological Horror, Speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-01
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-23 12:48:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20008552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joouheika/pseuds/joouheika
Summary: If I were to say I am not who I am, who is to say you are who you are? MAJOR SPOILERS UP TO CHP 119 (PLEASE HEED ALL WARNINGS/TAGS/NOTES AT THE BEGINNING OF THE WORK)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> **WARNING** this work contains the following graphic content: gang rape, incest, violence and gore, major character death, and other various disturbing themes that may not be suitable for many readers.
> 
> If any such content is to your distaste please refrain from reading.
> 
> All glaringly odd formatting/punctuation is on purpose to lend atmosphere to the work.

He doesn't know what is going on.

He doesn't know why he is here.

It hurtles toward him.

A dark, dark, dark familiar agony that he will be left all alone again. That because of his actions, his existence, all that will remain will be him. Him in this darkness. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Where ever this is. An unfamiliar yet familiar place. The walls towering, covering the horizon. 

Where is he?

Where are you?

There is screaming, crying, the scent of gun powder- smoke. 

Steam. Heat.

The cold.

His body is so cold. 

His heart is colder than ice.

Immobile.

As it flies over to him.

From those last few feet he'd hoped he'd cross.

Who?

Who is he thinking of?

Once running towards him.

Rolling, rolling, rolling across the dirt... unthinkable, unforgivable...

No...

He didn't want any of this.

Hoping it would have been his hand he'd felt.

Instead.

Rolled right into the palm of his outreached hand.

Eren's head.

His little brother's head.

Vacant green eyes cannot stare back into his. The numbness in his body is overtaken by one emotion.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Despair.

Zeke screams.

He screams himself hoarse.

All around him settles the silence of the grave.

\--

His screams are loud in his ears as he wakes.

Sweat dripping across every limb, drenching the bed and flickering off his face as he wrenches himself upwards, the covers bunched and tossed aside. 

His head pounding. Every muscle in his body clenching and straining in pain, not even close to the infeasible suffering that had been that dark place. Within his mind's eye, his slumbering subconsciousness. Zeke struggles for breath. The bright moonlight of the otherwise dark night, ever brighter because it is so, gleaming through the window as his ruckus wakes up Eren beside him. Who had up until that point been sleeping peacefully. He sits up with Zeke, his confusion and worry apparent. A hand already to Zeke's broad shoulders, rubbing soothing circles across them. Eren leaning against him.

A lock of his dark hair falls forward, tickling Zeke's shoulder.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Eren asks, "Did you have a bad dream again?"

The words seem almost foreign across Eren's tongue. To Zeke's ears. Zeke turns to look at him. Tears catching at the edge of his stricken eyes. Suddenly afraid he had not understood, and what is real is not really. Fear and anguish stretched across every line of his expression, contorting into the sorrow he could not then process. He throws his arms around Eren, embracing him. His face tucked to the crook of Eren's neck.

Eren murmuring gently, his hands evermore gentle across his back, trying to comfort him.

"My dear big brother..."

Zeke wetting Eren's neck with tears, only able to call his name, "Eren! Eren!" trying to choke the tears back.

Eren does not ask what else could have frightened him so, what that dream- that nightmare was. It doesn't matter. All that matters is Zeke is here with him now. Eren resting in Zeke's arms. Eren's arms wrapped around him as well. His fingers reaching for Zeke's hair, stroking through it as Zeke sobs against the crook of his neck, then against his chest, his breasts. His cries strangled, a cut off howl. Estranged to be here where those who've waken are.

"There, there," Eren tells him, "There's nothing anymore to be afraid of."

Eren inches down, as they've laid back against their pillows, their mattress. At Zeke throwing himself at him. So they've returned to be, eye to eye. Eren's gentle touch never leaving him. His fingers back to his hair. His slightly curved in, slim fingers brushing his cheek. Feeling how hot and wet the trails of his tears are.

Eren smiles at him.

"Come here, Zeke."

And Zeke does.

His mouth hasty and sloppy over Eren's, kissing him desperately. Deeply. Their hot wet saliva, mingling as their tongues mesh together, Eren moaning against him. Inhaling happily, his breath, his scent, as they taste each other. Eren clinging onto him as Zeke had to he when he'd woke.

Their mouths parting, reluctantly. A shimmering remainder of that heat between them. Rebuilding. As Zeke kisses down Eren's cheek, to his neck. Sucking at it ravenously. Wanting to leave a mark on every part, every inch of it. Intact. Eren crying out, when Zeke's teeth catch. Biting and bruising. Zeke's large hands wrapped about Eren's arms, to keep him in place. Moving down, to feel the rest of his body, his moving hips. Eren grinding his lower half against him. Straddling a thigh as Zeke finally has left enough marks across Eren's pretty neck to his satisfaction. For now. Moving to his flat breasts, he sucks Eren's nipples through the thin fabric of his short nightdress. Rubbing his face to them, against them. Panting harshly as he tries not to think, to remember, about before, earlier- that horrible dream, that place-

Sucking harder.

"There," Eren says, more urgently, his sweet voice pitched in pleasure, "There Zeke!"

Eren enjoying Zeke's mouth on him, rolling his teats across his tongue, between his teeth. Zeke reaches lower, his fingers running up Eren's smooth and bare leg, the side of his thigh, his hip and waist. To tug up the skirt of the already bunching nightdress. Hitching it high up to expose Eren's nipples. Sucking on them bare, licking and biting at them, more roughly than he'd intended. Encouraged by Eren's hands in his hair, clutching, and stroking the back of his head. Cradling him to him. Zeke moans, as Eren does. Eren's breath caught, and flurried. As Zeke presses him against their bed, onto his back. Eren's legs opening up to him, his fat thighs already rubbing eagerly against Zeke's hips. Eren wanting to entrap him between them.

Zeke tugs down his sweats, his cock freed as Eren scoots closer to him, rutting his hips up. Ready to have Zeke inside him. Zeke reaches for the lube on their nightstand. Slicking Eren up, Eren gasping harshly on feeling Zeke's fingers. Rolling his hips as he cries out, wanting something else, something more fulfilling. Zeke hating to make him wait, but it'll feel better like this. He promises, wordlessly as he dips forward to kiss at Eren's neck, his cheek. Eren looking over at him, overflowing with desire. A thrumming temperature, that buzzes within Zeke's ears. Humming along the length of his spine, like the pleasure he feels, as his cock is swallowed up by Eren's tight and ready hole. Eren fucking his asshole on Zeke's cock immediately, as delirious as Zeke is. Pounding it inside him. 

The moonlight revealing a cut of their joined bodies, as they fuck the terror of the night away.

\--

The little bell rings on the door of the clinic.

Announcing his arrival, many hours late.

Zeke scratches nonchalantly at his ear, as he tries to explain to their dad, why he's so late. Unable to come up with anything on his own. And not feeling too guilty since it is Grisha he is inconveniencing. Not Eren.

Even so, he's still relieved when Eren comes to his rescue. Emerging from his office with the patient he'd been seeing to, a mother and her small child. Setting to see them off at the door Zeke had arrived through, into the waiting room. Eren on seeing Zeke has finally arrived to give their dad a break. Explains for him.

"Daddy, I already told you he'd be a little late. He wasn't feeling well last night," Eren tells Grisha, smoothly, "Just some fatigue," Eren adds, little lies that hold some truth. How easily Eren carries them. Even if he wasn't their father's favourite, Zeke thinks. Eren would still get away with this sort of excuse. 

Meanwhile Grisha is frowning over at his eldest son, with that exact sort of frown Zeke knew he would. He'd almost stayed in today to avoid it. Given how much it annoys him. Truly, this sort of excuse would not have cut it if he'd said it himself. No doubt Grisha is wondering what sort of lie or 'act' Zeke had put on to fool Eren to say all this.

"If you say so..." Grisha even affirms, patting Zeke's shoulder, "Take it easy," he tells him but still goes off for his lunch and those errands he'd been waiting to do. Since Zeke is supposed to finish the rest of today's appointments. Least all the ones unrelated to pediatrics. That's Eren's area.

The remaining hours drag on.

He'd thought he was feeling better but it's apparent he isn't. He's worried he hasn't been doing the greatest job. Luckily nothing overly serious had to be done, mainly just consultation over concerns patients have over such and such symptom they think they had, a common cold, routine health checkups. Zeke is bidding good bye to his last patient of the day, with more than a little relief. Hoping it's not too obvious he's ready for everyone to be gone.

It's odd, but Eren always says Zeke is the one that's good with people. Able to see both sides, and talk neutrally yet good naturedly with all. No matter the tough situation. Unlike him who couldn't help but cry or get angry, even in front of the patient. Sometimes at the patient, if he was scolding them to make sure they take their medicine, or drop a bad habit. Honestly Zeke thinks that's more human. And more appreciated by their patients. The fact that their father's research and skills, knowledge being passed on to them is top notch too... there are a lot of factors for why Eldians prefer to visit their clinic. The best care in the Liberio ghetto they could even claim.

Zeke really prefers Eren's manner, even if he's incapable of it for himself. Always needing a front before others. 

Even towards his parents. When Zeke was little and upset, he'd bottle it all in and cry in his room. But he remembers Eren as a child had let it all out, right then and there. Serious or not. He always let who know who was hurting him, or wronging him what he felt and why he felt it. This was just what he did, and while he'd shimmered down as an adult in that aspect. Since only children cry and make a fuss over all sorts of things. He's also like that about positive emotions as well. His smile still so adorable, pretty. Especially when he turns it to Zeke, wanting to share with him something that has pleased him. Interested him. Excited him. And such a smile... always will be so, in Zeke's eyes... his chest feeling warm and fuzzy as he regards Eren helping his last patient, a mother with her newborn. Eren rocking her baby to sleep. Her baby wouldn't sleep she complained, wondering what she was doing wrong. Eren reassuring her this happens, it's not her fault, all babies are different. She was especially worried since this is her second child... and she'd not have problems like this with the first. She jokes she'll just have to keep coming to this clinic, if her baby insists he'll only fall asleep in Doctor Eren's arms.

Eren discusses what other options she can try, knowing she was joking (probably). Zeke trying to not stare so blatantly at Eren with the baby in his arms. How natural and perfect he looks with a little one cradled against him. Eren had really found his calling here. Zeke isn't surprised the baby fell asleep right away with Eren's nurturing touch. Children, babies- they all seem to love Eren. They must sense that he loves them too. Adores them. Zeke has never wanted to have children... the reason to that... he just can't recall. It more a feeling than anything, but he does at times feel guilty that he and Eren will never have children of their own. Even if Eren had been born a woman, Zeke has considered. Eren surely as beautiful as one. Taking strongly after his mother. Maybe that's why children adore him so, anyone would love to have him as their kind and beautiful mother. Zeke contemplates.

Distracted again as Eren approaches him, the baby sleeping soundly in his lulling hold. The mother looking less stressed as she regards the note written instructions she'd been given. Some small habits to be changed first- to try, before resorting to medicine.

"The Grice family's new baby, look Zeke, isn't he so cute?" Eren is showing him off to Zeke, it apparent Eren adores every tiny finger and toe. "He has a big brother, just like me," Eren tells Zeke, smiling warmly. Zeke blinks back some tears, usually not so sentimental. He's really off today. Eren catches on to them, surprise alighting his pretty features before he sees his patients out. Almost unwilling to pass the mother her baby back, the baby too cute. Eren is too cute. The mother laughs happily at him. Glad for her baby to be praised so. She tells Eren he'll be great when he has children of his own.

Eren locks the door after her, hers was the last of their appointments today.

They just need to file some paperwork and tidy up a little (since they disinfect with every visit), and then they can go home.

Eren heads to the back, to fetch some tablets and a glass of water.

Holding them out to Zeke who is sitting on a nearby waiting bench. His head in his hands. Looking rather worn.

"Take these," Eren tells him, Zeke nodding. Does as he's told. Eren taking the empty glass from him. Feeling his brow with his.

"Hopefully that'll cool you down too. You still have a headache don't you?" 

Eren has set aside the glass and crouches down before him, stretching his hands out to his. Zeke holding Eren's hands. Feeling his proximity, having his scent flood his senses, his figure in his vision... Zeke is starting to feel a lot better. Or maybe he should give more credit to the medicine? Nope, Eren is definitely his remedy.

"Let me finish up. Rest up right here until I'm done, alright?" Eren says, kindly and softly like he would to the children whose ailments he sees to. Zeke laughing lightly at that, he feels quite like a child too. With Eren crouched down like he is. Usually to be at eye level with his patients, is at a lower one with Zeke. It's adorable, Zeke cannot help but roll that thought about, that feeling in his mind. Enjoying it immensely. Ready to be home, and for Eren to be crouched down before him in another manner, on his knees, between his legs. Sucking him off- if he feels better Eren would do that for him. Eren might even do that for him to make him feel better. He could suggest it. Zeke is feeling too sly, not wanting to take advantage of Eren's kindness but also wanting all of it to himself.

Eren rises, cupping his cheek, stroking it as he bends forward to peck him a kiss on the lips.

"Wait for me big brother," Eren says, too sweetly, Zeke feeling like melted butter as Eren hurries off to do all else that needs to be done. So they can go home, together.

\--

Zeke and Eren live together in a house of their own, but their parents live in a large duplex. Where the pair of them had been raised together. It looking much the same as it had then, just with different generations added, new neighbors. Children with different toys. Grandmas with different potted plants. Familiar laundry hung up to dry on the lines on the rooftop.

The reason they're here-

Unfortunately, as Eren had been putting in order Zeke and Grisha's desk he'd seen what Zeke had missed. So thrown off by his headache (Eren also scolding him, since he feels a little better, why didn't he take something sooner if he felt so crummy- just like his brother to try to tough it out!) that he hadn't noticed that Grisha had left his doctor's bag. They need to take it to him, in case he needs to pay an emergency house visit outside clinic hours. Their father is a kind man, even if at times he's adept. Zeke mentions to Eren's chagrin, since he left his bag to begin with.

Eren has the bag at hand.

Zeke raises his fist to knock at the door of the older Yeager residence.

The door already, slowly... parts open. Even before his fist could make contact with the wood.

The doorway is darkened.

Unusual for the curtains to already be drawn at this time of day.

They're pulled back. 

In a flood of light, the door opens further- and Zeke feels a hand- Eren's hand at his back.

Pushing him through.

Snaps and pops ringing out.

As confetti and ribbon burst out from both sides, showering him.

"'Happy Birthday!'" they all cry out!

Dina, his mother, Grisha's first wife to his right. And Eren's mother Carla, Grisha's second wife to his left. Both they and Grisha are smiling at him, laughing at his surprise. The emptied party streamers at hand. Zeke straightens up. Having ducked, wary of all that was going on.

"He forgot his own birthday, again," Eren is saying, as he comes in from behind him. Shutting the door. Grisha comes over from the opened curtains, to kiss Eren's cheek. Thanking him for bringing him his bag. A ploy, Zeke realises, to get him over here so they could surprise him like this.

Dina has looped her arm through his, her cheeks a dark pink from her pale face. Her smile wide as it always is when she's so happy, as she leads him over to the dining room. Where food is laid out. Both she and Carla had been cooking all day to make him this birthday feast.

It always amazes Zeke, how the two of them get along. He really thinks they shouldn't have. Since he remembers his mother had not smiled at all when Grisha had decided to take a second wife. Grisha allowed to, since as a doctor it means despite being Eldian he is quite well off. Even if he did prefer to live in this duplex. His excuse being he liked to be around people, his neighbors. He could help better if he was closer to them. Maybe that's what he'd felt too, taking another wife. He was helping her. The child he'd put in her. Society. He was helping society. Setting an example.

It must be water under the bridge.

Zeke has no complaints, since out of it, he'd gotten his cute little brother.

Dina shows him the table.

Along the length of it, a variety of foods. Honeyed chicken wings, a cheesy potato casserole, steamed vegetables with melted butter, his favourite sort of bratwurst (no sneaky spices only the meat and fat), and most lovely of it all- a large white cake. Topped with an assortment of sweet and colourful fruits.

Likewise colourfully wrapped presents are at the end of the table, waiting for him to open them.

Strangely, on seeing all this, he feels young again.

Even if the memory seems too bright.

(Was there ever a time like this in his childhood? There had to be, with Eren-)

The room is rather bright for evening Zeke thinks.

Blinking.

Suddenly they are all seated.

Him at the head of the table.

He doesn't remember sitting down.

And the room is darker, twinged with the red and orange sunset. As it should have been. Not the vibrancy of midday. It already past.

His mother sits to the left of him, Eren to his right. Grisha next to Dina. Carla next to Eren. They all look at him expectantly. Eren asking him.

"What would you like to eat first? Big brother?"

Zeke makes a thoughtful hmmm, and hahhh. As he surveys the spread before him. The cake strangely at the opposite end of the table now. The presents the same. The food looks like it's all been rotated, because of where he's sitting. Thoughtful and prompt. He considers. Trying not to focus on the loss of time. It shoved out from his mind as soon as he looks at the potatoes. Deciding on them. Eren reaching for them. Zeke also unsure if they'd been closest to Eren, which would make sense as to why he's reaching for them.

Eren scoops him a hefty hunk. His mother not wanting to be outdone reaches for the bratwurst, serving some to him. Eren reaching for the chicken. Serves it to him. His mother then getting the vegetables for him. Some bread. Some fish. Some apple cobbler. Some shrimp. Some rice. An array of food he does not recall originally being on this table. How his plate fits it all. Where it had come from. It doesn't matter. He eats it all. It is all so delicious.

They made it just for him, for his birthday.

Which is today.

Today.

"Cake and then presents?" Dina asks him, her wide smile ever present.

"Ohhh," Zeke considers, looking across all of them, their clean empty plates. Looking like no one else has eaten. He adjusts his glasses. Seeing he is wrong. Food on the plates now, mostly eaten. So full and happy from the food he'd seen wrong. Maybe those tablets Eren had given him had been too strong?

They all watch him attentively, sitting patiently. Waiting.

Zeke shakes his head.

"I'm really full from the food. How about presents before the cake?"

Dina nods happily.

Grisha passing along the wrapped gifts. One by one. As Zeke opens them.

One by one.

The gifts from Carla and his mother very thoughtful. Things he would like. A new baseball bat, then also a new mitt. He suspects his dad would give him, a new baseball to make this a complete set, but instead from him- are a pair of leather shoes. Rather stylish. Not really good for running, like Zeke would prefer. A comfort over aesthetic sort of guy. 

Eren helps him like the gift a little, "You'll look even more handsome with these on."

Setting all his gifts aside into a neat pile for him, so he can look at them. As they have cake. It next.

"My gift for you is at home," Eren explains, "Actually, daddy helped me with it. That's why it was really important he went out today. That makes sense doesn't it Zeke?" Eren says to him.

Zeke accepting Eren's explanation, not sure why for everything else. It feels off. He feels off. It's him isn't it? He really wants to go home. Is what Zeke is thinking. Wishing this was all over so he could be back home with Eren. 

Whatever Eren got him, he'll be sure to love.

Zeke is thinking.

Thinking.

Thinking even as the cake is set before him.

How much he adores Eren.

How much he loves him.

Dina lights the candles. One by one.

They dim the already dim lights.

He can't live without Eren.

Zeke blows out the candles, making a simple wish.

That they'll go home soon.

The lights turned back on.

Blaring in the dining room instantly.

It's painfully bright. Not like it was before.

They eat the cake in silence, all very attentive to the texture, the flavour, the sweetness. Zeke likes the sweetness he thinks. Like Eren who too loves sweets, surely Eren-

"Eren Eren Eren EREN! EREN THIS **EREN THAT!** _ENOUGH!_ I'M TIRED OF IT!" 

Dina has suddenly stood up.

Her voice angry but her smile wide, wider, wider on her stretching cheeks as she'd screeched that. Her chair throttled back as she'd stood up. On the floor as her hands shake in fists at her sides. Her head looking disproportionate to her body suddenly.

"Why do you only care about him? _What about us Zeke?_ What about us? We're here too! I'm your mother! I'm Grisha's wife! Not that bitch over there! _Why do you only care about that whore's son?_ " Dina is shrieking at him, her smile looking like it will peel right off from her face. Her skin stretches and her eyes gleaming, gleaming, gleam brighter than the lights. Her voice lowers. An octave too low. And the room is different.

It's dim again.

All around the table.

Dina is standing.

Carla is standing.

Grisha is standing. 

Eren is standing.

Zeke remains seated, frosting smeared across one of the corners of his lips. From the last bite of cake he'd taken.

Everything seems frozen except for Dina, her grin tearing past her cheeks parting ever wider as she laughs. Taking up the knife she'd used to cut the cake. Jerkily she draws it towards her.

Zeke had not even blinked yet now Grisha is sitting. Eren too. Their faces unseen, lowered to the half eaten cake on their plates.

No longer standing at her place at the table, instead, right in front of Dina.

Carla with her eyes fearful, unbearably sad.

Then suddenly painfully gasping, as if all the air is being crushed out from her lungs.

Carla asks Dina.

" _Why did you have to ruin everything?_ "

In answer Dina stabs her through the chest with the knife, over and over, laughing harder, more, lowly, lowly, lowly, continuous unending like her smile as the blood that begins to spurt from all the cuts she delves deep into Carla's body. Rupturing. Blood streams out from Dina's smile. The crimson pours over the table, onto the floor, onto

ZzzzzzzzzzzzeeeeeeeKKKEeeeeeeeeee

It was a nice dinner.

Aside that he had fallen asleep and had that unnerving nightmare. Another one huh. He frets, waking up on the couch at some point. Eren sitting with him, resting Zeke's head on his lap. Watching over him. Stroking his hair out from his sweat soaked brow. Padding at it with a cool damp cloth. What a wonderful little brother he has, Zeke had thought, happy the first thing he sees on waking up is Eren.

When he was well enough to sit up. Everyone laughed at him good naturedly. They hadn't even gotten the drinks out yet! their father might have joked.

Zeke wondering if that weird vision was on account of the medicine. Oh, that's it. It was those tablets. Maybe Eren gave him one too many, that happens. An honest mistake. Some unusual side effects is all. 

Beneath the starry sky, the moon bright and full. 

They are walking home.

Zeke unsure why this unnerves him so. Does he not like the night? No. He loves the moonlight. Seeing a full moon somehow always gives him a sense of peace, of reassurance. That everything will fall into play. He attempts to figure it out then. What about the night? When he can't. He becomes focused on how he's so disappointed that since both his hands are occupied with his birthday gifts, he can't hold Eren's free hand. Eren with a bag, carrying the leftover food they didn't finish- Dina, no Carla, no it had to be Dina... but why was that? Had insisted they take most of it home, since it's for Zeke. 

Zeke is looking forward to eating... the leftovers.

Suddenly realising why it unnerves him to walk so late out at night.

It's summer so, the sun must have set hours and hours ago.

"Isn't it past curfew?" Zeke wonders aloud.

Eren turns to him.

The sun setting behind him.

The orange red indigo horizon sinking beneath the ghetto walls as Eren blinks over at him, light urgency in his voice, "Almost! We better hurry then!"

Zeke surprised, yet delighted, as Eren reaches to grab his hand. He'd somehow figured out how to juggle everything in one, he supposes. For once not fretting about the small stuff. With Eren's skin to his, Eren smiling at him as they make a mad dash back to their residence. Back to their home. Zeke can't be happier.

\--

At home sweet home, Eren shows him what his gift to him is.

Placed in their living room near their very used and very comfortable couch.

Is a brand new radio.

State of the art. It can probably pick up channels even Marleyans shouldn't listen to. Much less Eldians of Marley. A golden frame to match the golden buttons, sleek polished dark brown wood, and a blue white face behind the shiny dial. It would be heavy on his own so Eren had asked Grisha, with some of his father's friends to move it in. Not wanting to break it, thinking he would if he'd tried all by himself. Eren had gotten it for him because he thought Zeke would love to listen to some baseball games, even if it was for teams they could never play in, or even see for themselves. Not allowed to leave this place. Regardless.

"Thank you," Zeke says, tears at the edge of his eyes, "Truly. It's amazing Eren! You're amazing!" 

Scooping him into his arms, Eren giggling as Zeke picks him up. Twirling him about. Eren kissing him on the lips on his way back down, practically melting in Zeke's arms. So happy Zeke is happy with his gift.

"Is it better than everyone else's?" Eren asks, Zeke nodding fervently. Eren laughing at him some more, pushing at his chest, teasing, "Then go try it out! I won't stop you!"

Zeke smacks a loud wet kiss to Eren's cheek. Almost dragging Eren to come with him, as he runs over to test out his new radio set. Eren tugging himself out from Zeke's grip, off to the kitchen. Zeke fawning over the sound quality, how clear it is as he tunes in to all sorts of stations. He rifles through a myriad of programmes and bands, before settling on one. Liking the lazy beat of whatever song this is, in a tongue he's heard before but doesn't know. Funny on how that might be-

Eren interrupts his thoughts, coming in from the kitchen. Where Zeke heard him pop open a bottle of champagne. Bringing over to him a glass, carrying one for himself. They clink the glasses.

Eren saying, "Since you didn't get to drink over at our folks'."

"Better to drink at home," Zeke says, smacking his lips after a sip, rather satisfied, that's where they are. Eren glances at him, the quirk in his smile saying he wants to scold him, for being unsocial to even their parents. But he won't since it's his birthday.

On that note.

Eren sets his empty glass down on the coffee table, wrapping his arms across Zeke's shoulders. Zeke sets his glass down on the bookshelf. To free his hands up, and clasp them at Eren's waist. Knowing exactly what Eren wants, with the music on like it is. Dancing leisurely about the living room, a light sway, and simple turn when they feel like it. Eren drawing closer to him with each gliding step until Zeke is embracing him.

Inhaling the floral scent of Eren's hair, from the shampoo he always uses. Sometimes using it on Zeke too when they bathe together. Zeke chuckles about that, Eren sleepily asking what he's laughing about. So Zeke tells him. He feels the edge of Eren's smile against his collarbone.

"Sappy," Eren says, starting to lay kisses to his neck. Eren pushing at his chest suddenly, at that final twirl. Seating him onto the couch. Zeke looks up expectantly, for only a few seconds. Eren back in his arms, kissing him hurriedly, eagerly. Eren straddling him and humping against him as they make out. Zeke wanting nothing more than to suck on Eren's tongue all night.. 

Until Eren forcefully pushes him away once more. So Eren can get down onto the floor, onto his knees. Reaching to unbuckle Zeke's belt, Zeke sucks in a tight breath once Eren has taken hold of his cock. And is pumping it diligently. Eren moaning, needy at the sight of Zeke's cock, seems to be barely able to contain himself. As he licks his soft pink lips, and opens his mouth to accept Zeke's cock inside it. Sucking right away at the tip. Greedily licking up and down his big brother's member.

Relishing in each of Eren's loud moans, muffled as he begins to take Zeke's length into his mouth more, down some of his throat. Eren sucks on Zeke's dick like there's nothing else he rather be doing. His cheeks flushed, his brow furrowed as he licks and moans around his big brother's pulsing cock. His gentle fingers caressing at Zeke's balls as his long pretty dark hair spills forward. Zeke greedily untying it from the partial bun Eren has it in usually. To keep those strands away from his face. Zeke still able to see such a pretty face as Eren sucks him off, with his fingers combing through Eren's hair. Holding it back for him, each silky lock in his grasp. Zeke marveling at how good everything feels. Figuring Eren is comfortable enough with how readily he's sucking him, for him to thrust into Eren's mouth some. Carefully so he doesn't force anything, but enough for the impossible to occur- for it to feel even better than it had a couple seconds ago. Eren's head even bobbing up and down more vigorously to meet his thrusts. His amazing and amazingly sexy little brother, Zeke marvels. Overcome, wanting to cum. Groans deeply as Eren takes him even deeper. His lips to the hilt of Zeke's extremely long and thick cock. Eren has told him too, how much he likes it. How long Zeke's dick is since it always feels so good inside him-

Zeke cums at that.

Eren happily slurping him down, a hand gripping at his inner thigh as Eren gulps up his cum. Another hand held to Zeke's still in his hair. Zeke will have to apologise for pulling at it too hard by washing it for Eren. Brushing it. Zeke looks forward to it. That, and having Eren's wet naked body pressed to his. Soon. Zeke thinks giddily, watching as Eren carefully inches his cock out from his still swallowing throat, from his mouth, his lips. His spit slick against all of it, mixed with Zeke's ejaculation as it trails and snaps from Eren's mouth and the tip. Eren licking at his lips, feeling the new wetness there. His startled 'Ahh!' a touch hoarse from his used throat, when Zeke picks him up. Settling him next to him on the couch.

Zeke hasn't even put his dick away, already pawing at Eren's clothes. Wanting them off. So he can taste Eren too.

The smooth instrumental music in the background, playing softly from the radio, the perfect accompaniment to Eren's sweet moans.

Zeke ravishes him for hours.

Eren a perfect birthday treat.

\--

The night is long.

Zeke considers.

Waking up to buzzing static.

The room dark.

Too exhausted from their lovemaking to make it to their bed, they'd made due on the couch. Zeke in his boxers and Eren with Zeke's shirt pulled over his very sampled body. Zeke teasing him then, about how shy he is. Not wanting to get naked on their couch. Yet always so willing in their bed. Eren is also cute like that. A little old fashioned. 

He's snuggled up in Zeke's arms, his face to his chest. Slumbering contently.

A little drool spilled out. That's cute too, Zeke thinks, wiping at it. Feeling warm all over from just looking at Eren. He presses a kiss to Eren's brow. Wanting nothing more than to stay here like this. But he supposes they should go to bed. It's actually rather chilly in the living room. Even against each other. They'd pulled the blanket from the back of the couch to sleep with. But it's not big enough for the both of them. Their feet sticking out. 

Eren already tucking it in around himself, curling up, with Zeke slipping out to get up. He'll turn the radio off. Carry Eren to bed. And they can rest warm and toasty there until morning.

Zeke looks around for a clock.

Wanting to know the time.

The static on the radio suddenly getting louder, as he walks closer to the set.

Has there ever been a clock in this room?

His hand hovers over the off button as the static starts to clear.

From the silence of the set he hears a voice.

" _Please..._ "

Wobbled, and pathetic.

On the verge of tears.

A convergence of sorrow and desperation.

" _...please wait!_ "

Zeke cannot bring himself to turn the set off.

Unnerved, instead he sets to change the channel, turning the dial.

Static tunes in and out, varying in strength and degree.

He cannot pick up anything else.

No news, no music, no laughter-

He can only hear that voice.

Warbled through the static.

"...plEAse DoN'T scReaM..."

His heart aches.

Somehow he knows this voice.

Piercing through the darkness of this room, he's somehow turned back to the silence of the undesired station.

Without a doubt.

" _MISTER ZEKE PLEASE!_ " 

His heart pounds sickly a mile a second in the blink of an eye he's fallen back horrified at the fact that someone someone someone had just said his name, someone is begging on the other side of the radio set from far away from far ago somewhere someone and something

Zeke scrambles forward, trying to get up. He can only manage to crawl. He struggles to reach the radio set. He must turn it off. 

Undeniably, " _SLAUGHTER EACH OTHER AS MUCH AS YOU WANT! MARLEYANS AND ELDIANS! KILL WHOEVER YOU WANT! BUT MY LITTLE BROTHER! PLEASE LEAVE MY-_ "

Zeke manages to turn off the radio.

That was a young man's voice.

Colt.

That was Colt's voice.

He knows this for certain and yet he doesn't know.

He doesn't understand?

Who is Colt?

It is bizarre.

The relief he should have on finally catching the end of his last thought instead of falling ahead into another the next and the next and the next and the next and the next and the next and the next and the next and the next and

There's a buzzing in his ears, ringing.

A painful migraine pushes against the top of his skull.

Oh.

Oh it hurts.

It hurts.

Like the voice that'd followed the sound of silence, the static.

Zeke clutches at his head.

Whimpering in pain, miserable.

"Zeke. Is it another headache?" Eren is crouched down next to him.

Zeke looking over to him fearfully, suddenly worried, he'd known where Eren was. Yet he hadn't. He hadn't noticed him get up from the couch, or hear him this time in the kitchen. Fetching this glass of water, and these tablets for him.

"Here," Eren says, holding them out for him, "Take these."

Zeke swallows thickly, shaking his head. Trembling all over, Eren frowning in concern at that.

"N-no. No more Eren!" 

Realising he's being far too terse than is necessary, Zeke swallows a couple breaths. Trying to compose himself, even as he sweats. Uncomfortable and transparent. Feeling weak.

"I'm sorry my sweetheart. I... I don't think the medicine is working. Actually. From what happened yesterday, I think it might be making whatever this is worse."

Eren dips forward, feeling Zeke's hot brow with this. Zeke sighing out in relief. The tremors in his body lessening, feeling Eren's brow to his.

"This time, it's only tablets to help you sleep," Eren says... coaxingly... carefully. As if Zeke has misunderstood. Eren smiles at him reassuringly and Zeke almost takes the medicine, feeling shameful that he'd made Eren feel like he didn't trust him.

Before Zeke can, Eren take the pills himself. Knocking them back with some water. Swallowing.

"See?" he says, giving Zeke's cheek a soft little kiss.

Eren rises carefully. Already lethargic.

He really had no need to take the sleeping pills, usually so sleepy. He yawns. Ready to go back to it.

"Let's go to bed," Zeke says, "Maybe I'll sleep better there."

Eren nods, tucked under his arm.

They go to bed.


	2. Chapter 2

The longest night.

This must be.

Zeke thinks.

Eren sleeping soundly beside him. Unable to be roused.

Since he'd taken the pills.

Zeke considers if he should too.

He'd caught some zzzs, for he feels a little rested. Much better than before. But if he had really, he should have slept a few hours. And if that were so, why has the sun not risen yet? 

Zeke gets out of bed. Deciding he must be losing his damn mind. He probably hadn't slept at all and it's the sleep deprivation. If he'd only done as Eren had said and taken those pills earlier, he'd be sleeping soundly just like Eren. Stupid! He's stupid! Zeke heads into the kitchen for a glass of water, intending to open up the bottle Eren had gotten those sleeping pills from. Unable to locate it.

Confused.

As he opens every shelf of every cabinet. Every drawer. Every door.

And it's empty.

Everything is empty.

Completely.

Like nothing had ever been in anything.

Zeke steps back, bewildered.

Not understanding how this could be so.

He decides to try to wake Eren.

Maybe Eren will know.

On his way back to their bedroom, he passes by their front door.

Noticing.

The doorknob is rattling.

Zeke pauses.

Concerned someone is trying to come in, break in.

He looks around, picking up one of his gifts. The new baseball bat. It at the ready, in position. He carefully walks closer towards the door. Jumping. When the doorknob stops rattling and someone knocks. Politely even. 

"Eren?"

A boyish voice calls.

A loud whisper.

"Eren are you in there?"

Zeke's palms are full of sweat.

Trying to tighten his grip around the bat. 

Whose voice is this?

Was this a patient... a friend of Eren's?

If so, why are they visiting him in the dead of the night?

Zeke understands if it's an emergency, but wouldn't it make sense if they gave them a call first? And wouldn't they be speaking louder and with more urgency? How odd. How peculiar.

Since ah ah ah ah that's right. Eldians have curfew. They aren't permitted to be walking around at night like this, even in their own ghetto. So who is there at the door?

Why are they here?

Why are they looking for Eren?

"Eren!" a couple more knocks, a little more firm, "It's me!"

Whoever they are they are here to get Eren in trouble.

Why else would they be knocking at this hour, trying to get him to go out?

No.

Oh no.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

Zeke will not allow this.

The doorknob rattles.

The knocks louder.

"It's me Eren! Your friend! ARMIN ARLERT!"

Zeke reaches for the doorknob.

His bat raised.

Shock coursing through him as through the door a knife? No. A sword. Has cut through. Piercing into his chest. Zeke looks down in shock, as red oozes out from the wound-

"You're up early."

Zeke turns around.

Eren awake, partially dressed, his bed head apparent.

Sunlight filtering through the windows, one open to let the breeze in. Drifting up are the lace curtains Eren so likes. Eren walks over to him. Two coffee mugs at hand. He passes one to Zeke.

Zeke takes it, looking back down to his no longer bleeding chest.

Had it been bleeding?

He looks into his mug of coffee, noticing it's not as dark as usual.

Eren looks at him, a tilt of his head in inquiry. Taking a sip of his cream heavy coffee. Ah, so Eren had added a splash to his. Tired of him burning his tongue every morning in an effort to cut calories. No doubt his overly kind, considerate little brother had been blowing at the steam too and once it was cooled, was going to go wake Zeke up. But then Zeke had already been up... and he's here... by the door? Why is he by the door?

"If you're that excited about our date today, you better hurry and get dressed for it," Eren remarks, chipper. His lovely smile all for Zeke. Eren turns around, heading back into the kitchen.

"What do you want for breakfast?" Eren asks.

His form disappearing from sight as he rounds the corner.

Zeke follows after him quickly. Suddenly apprehensive. As if Eren will vanish from his sight forever.

More mischievously Eren suggests, opening the fridge, "How about some of your leftover birthday cake?"

When Zeke fails to reply. Sluggish as he tries to catch up with time he thought had not been lost. The day so bright already. The morning warm.

Eren gives him a strange look, concerned.

"Oh um, yeah maybe," he finally replies.

Eren turns back to the fridge, "I can make something you know. Sausage and eggs or something. You want toast with it?"

Zeke doesn't know why.

But he advances forward, to look over Eren's shoulder into the fridge, as if there's something wrong... something in there that shouldn't be? He sees the cake Eren mentioned, some other leftovers, and various uncooked foods- such as the eggs and sausage.

Eren's pretty big eyes, widen at his sudden proximity, especially since it'd not come with a hug.

He picks the carton of eggs up, waving the paper wrapped sausages at Zeke, "If you're going to help, grab me a pan."

Zeke hurries to do so. Suddenly feeling so silly, what on earth was he worried about?

"This size alright?" Zeke asks pulling out the nearest one, Eren nods. Reaching to take it, and to stroke the top of Zeke's head. His big brother crouched down to fetch the pan.

"That should do, thank you dear."

They have a nice breakfast.

Another cup of coffee.

In the bath. Zeke washes Eren's hair as he'd been thinking about last night, Eren doing likewise for him. Making him smell just as he. As lovely as roses. Eren grinning at that, pressing his nose to Zeke's hair when it's all dry and fluffy. Laughing happily as he goes off to pick out some clothes for them. Meanwhile Zeke trims his beard in the bathroom mirror. Eren deciding they should dress less casual today since they're not just going to be 'moping around the house' Eren even says, actually sounding too much like their father. Zeke doesn't think Grisha had put Eren up to this, and shakes the feeling off. He's going to enjoy their day out together. Eren helping him with his tie and insisting he break in his new shoes. To look extra dashing, Eren suggests, even if he won't be doing much dashing in them. 

Eren with a bag a bit larger than Zeke is used to seeing him carry. Zeke offers to carry it for him. When Eren refuses he be allowed to, Zeke sort of thinks there might be another birthday gift in there, even if his birthday was yesterday. Eren would do that... to surprise him.

Eren's hand in his, off they go on their date.

Walking about through the town.

Eldians allowed scarce luxuries and not wanting to stand out in case it offends their Marleyan overseers. Most shop fronts don't bother to dazzle. What's inside is what counts, the quality of the make and what ingredients or materials they'd been allowed... bringing out the best in all they can from them. Generally speaking. They seem a gloomy bunch, a sea of stars muddling about in such cramped space. The paths a flow of them bunched together as they make their way where they need to go. 

Despite the restrictions. There's some colour here and there. The small well tended rose garden, they try not to let flourish too big, and be too obvious. Discreetly in a corner surrounded by shabby looking shops. A tall rusted iron gate. They don't want this taken away from them. There's a few others walking about it when they arrive (their first destination), admiring the flowers in a subdued manner. Zeke almost wanting to remind Eren to not let his excitement shine so through, such an emotion tolerated by children... and behind closed doors, the walls of your home. Maybe that's another reason why he likes to be home so much-

Of course he's always been bad about telling Eren no, so they're shot a couple tired, warning looks as Eren pulls him along hurriedly and happily. To marvel at the blooming and lush flowers.

His cheeks a touch flushed, from the enriching sight of the garden- the sweet scent of the flowers, how lovely they are. He tells Zeke. Zeke marveling at how lovely Eren is. Zeke reaches to tuck back a lock of Eren's hair that was sticking to his cheek, escaped from his bun. After they make it to the other side of the garden, another rusty gate to pass through. They walk arm in arm as they check out the market. Passing the worn fountain where offerings are sometimes thrown into the water (once more, discreetly) on holidays and special occasions. Children run by them- skipping chores, mothers try to haggle over the price of bruised produce, and if you were lucky your father or brother had not been drafted to fight in the war- fathers of necessary trades are teaching their skills to their apprentices, the most likely sons.

It's a rundown looking stall they stop at, the oven in the back and carted around by day. 

The pastries for sale here baked delicately. 

Between the two of them they share a cream cheese and strawberry compote filled, buttery and flaky, light sort of bread. The name no one knows of. Worried the Marleyans will take that away from them too if they knew. No Name bread.

Something like that.

After they eat, Eren ushers Zeke to backtrack over to the fountain. To wash up a little. Taking out his handkerchief, wetting it in the flowing spout where the water is clean. He wrings it out to wipe at their licked at fingers, their buttery mouths. Giggling as he brushes at the crumbs caught in Zeke's beard. Eren giving him a little nod, his gorgeous green eyes meeting Zeke's to tell him what he ought not say aloud. Zeke nods back to him, understanding Eren wants to make an offering to the fountain. Probably just a few coins, to thank the goddesses, and wish Zeke a happy birthday. To bless him and protect him. Zeke tries to nonchalantly cover Eren as he does this. Not thinking the offering necessary, but Eren sometimes likes the old ways. Zeke will indulge him even if to him it's hocus pocus, often deadly. Wouldn't the Eldian people be better accepted, if they just threw that away too? Every old custom that shackles them. But... the sentiment is enough. For people like them. Eren rummages in his bag for his coin purse, finding an extra shiny gold coin to toss. It blips heavily into the water. A prayer to be said in his heart with his head bowed and eyes shut, his hands clasped. A wish to be made.

With Eren's hand no longer in his.

Zeke admires each long slender finger, each pink nail.

His head suddenly feeling fuzzy.

...wish...?

Hadn't he made a wish last night...?

As he'd blown out the candles...

And then...

He hovers his hand above his eyes. The sun suddenly blaring. Zeke looks about. Trying not to do so too obviously, suspiciously. Seeing no guards in the area. Guards who are Eldians typically overlook little things, but occasionally a Marleyan will be about making sure they are on their best behavior. Always ready to enforce it. 

He sees children chided for chasing hens, a pair of sisters helping each other carrying a heap of dry cleaning back home, a delivery boy rushing about, families, lovers, friends. All churning about the market place during the hours they're allowed, always beneath the sun. Never the night. Zeke is relieved to see no uniforms... no Marleyan uniforms.

His eyes stop on something- someone peculiar.

Is that a uniform?

On that man.

What is he wearing?

It's so strange.

So foreign.

The ever present crowd, walks steadily behind the man. Their eyes downcast, as if they do not notice him. Vague and distant they are while his figure is obvious. Distinct. Becoming more so. As he stands apart from them, not part of the flow. Looking over in Zeke's direction. His body tense and still, all but for his eyes. His hatred filled eyes, glaring over at Zeke colder than how his body feels. Frigid frost. Zeke too becomes still, finding it hard to move. A sheep before the wolf.

Fear clutches every inch and surface of his body. A cold sweat drenches him as he finds it hard to breath. Why... why is that man staring at them? Why does he look at... him... that way?

As if he knows...

As if he knows everything?

Too strange is his outfit.

He is no guard. Not with that odd green mantle. It hides his armband, that can't be right. That's not allowed. The back of the mantle rustles in the breeze, the only movement aside from his steadily heaving shoulders. His clenched fists. Each steady breath taken, growing angrier. 

His hood up, shielding his face and yet even from this distance Zeke knows what he looks like.

Who he is.

Who is he?

His glaring eyes wish to bore a hole into him, straight through a vital point.

The people behind him, continue walking past him, not paying him any mind.

Even as this drags on.

It's not natural.

Odd.

Why?

Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

Why won't he look away?

He remains there, doing nothing else.

Zeke.

Is afraid.

What if he... comes over?

The thought that he will take even a single step towards them, hurtles Zeke into motion. Terrified.

Zeke reaches to clutch a hand onto Eren's shoulder.

"Hey... hey do you see that?" Zeke asks, not wanting to take his eyes off the odd figure, the out of place man. Trying not to sound too frantic even though he knows, once that step is taken all he'll want to do is run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run run

Run like the devil.

"See what?" Eren is asking, perturbed that Zeke has not turned towards him. So transfixed...terrified of... what? 

Who?

"T-that man..." Zeke says, his voice somehow incapable of not wavering as if his words cannot be real. What he's seeing is not-

"The one throwing the fish up for sale? The older one in the brown cap? Uhm..." Eren starts, his own finger trying to follow Zeke's where Zeke is pointing.

Zeke turns to look at Eren, unable to bear that bloodthirsty stare any longer.

"He's wearing something odd... a green cape or something..."

As Zeke turns back. 

As he thought, with his heart pounding in his ears. Blanched with distant buzzing.

The man is gone.

But even so, Eren says. Relieved he's finally got it.

"Ohh, him huh? I don't think it's a cape. It's the drape from his stall. Looks like he's closing up early today."

Zeke sees what Eren sees, a man taking down his stall, his workers helping him cart up his wares. They see in the corner of the activity, an Eldian officer citing the stall owner for something. Much better than being beaten by a Marleyan. That man is lucky in a way.

Zeke looks around, a prickling itch at every pore of his skin. 

Unable to spot where that figure had gone.

What...

What was that?

Something.

Something sinister.

That's all he can think of.

The pit of his stomach falling.

Eren's hand slips back into his.

What a weird thought to have. On such a nice day. It's a shame, Zeke considers. He'll have to tell Eren it's best if they go home for now. It isn't safe out here. It was never safe out here they should just go home. He has to protect Eren.

Eren turns to smile at him, cuddling up against him. His laughter light and carefree, the most beautiful sound in this ugly country, this whole wretched earth.

"Are you ready to move along, Zeke?"

Zeke is hesitant.

Deciding, awash with the warm light of Eren's smile that maybe they'll be alright. They can stay out just a little longer. It's gone now. That fear. And it had been the most compelling-

Since it has vanished.

"Where else shall we go to?" Zeke asks, and Eren leads the way.

\--

An old bookstore.

Its old shelves heavy with titles.

Most of which are propaganda, heavily censored publications. So Zeke is surprised there's a foreign language section. He supposes if you were unfortunate to be drafted, you might learn another tongue as part of your military training and also depending... on what you had to do. What you became. For your service. He and Eren have always been so fortunate to escape that fate, given their father's profession. Being a doctor is important, even as an Eldian, to the Marleyans. So they didn't have to employ their own for their lot. Those sinful and dirty Eldians.

Otherwise they might very well have been drafted... and if their father and Zeke's mother as they had mentioned briefly, so long ago Zeke can hardly remember- kept up in that trouble they'd been involved in with those Restorationists- maybe he and Eren would even have had to become Warriors. A scary thought. That they would have no peaceful days like this. Each day instead would have been a struggle, a gamble.

Zeke tries to find a book on the foreign language he thought he heard on the radio, that really nice song he'd tuned in to for his birthday. Somehow certain when his finger taps against the spine of one book. That it must be Hizurunese. The letters even seem familiar even if he can't read them, familiar in that he's seen them before? Where? Zeke wanders over to where Eren is. This book at hand, Eren might have an idea. Did they have a mixed patient, of Hizuru descent, so their records were in a foreign language? So unfortunate it would be. That because one of their parents is Eldian and they live in Marley, they must live in the ghetto. Instead of the vibrant nation in Asia.

Zeke would ask but he becomes distracted.

At the faded red book Eren has at hand, Eren flipping through it. Unaware Zeke is right beside him.

The book about many landscapes.

Snowy mountains, the hot sandy desert, and wondrous of all- the vast blue sea. 

Eren stops on this page, giving most attention to the sketch of the sea.

A shame, Zeke thinks, that the book he'd picked up are only of illustrations and not actual photographs.

Many Eldians unless they must work outside the ghetto (and as such, typically don't live as long as lives) have never seen such sights in real life. He's always known Eren has wanted to see the ocean. Explore the world. When he was young and didn't know better. Zeke glad Eren never got it into his head to enlist in the military to have that chance... and thus cut his life short. It's brutal out there. Not worth it. They're fortunate in their own way. It's all they can do to just keep living each day. They aren't anyone special and so they cannot change anything. And that's alright. So long as they have each other.

Zeke reaches to stroke Eren's cheek.

Marveling as Eren does the sea, the beauty of his long eyelashes, his full pink lips.

Startling Eren who finally notices him at his touch.

Sucking in a breath harshly, he snaps the book shut.

A second too late, that Zeke's mind finally registers what else had been odd about the book. Aside its old styled drawings. The letters are foreign. They look nothing like Marleyan Eldian script. He'd seen nothing like it in the foreign language section actually.

"You scared me," Eren says, looking at him sheepishly. He puts the book back on the shelf. Zeke somehow unable to determine where. As if the other books are camouflage. Zeke starts to bring up his book to show Eren. Eren taking it from his hands without looking, casually setting it aside. Zeke distracted as Eren brings up the watch on his wrist. The face unreadable with the light glaring off it.

"Oh! Look at the hour! We're almost late for our reservation!"

Eren pushes at Zeke's back, urging him to move forward in the cramped and narrow space of the multitude of bookshelves.

"Let's hurry big brother!"

\--

Zeke chuckles.

Bringing his foaming glass up with Eren's to toast.

"You couldn't have told me?" he asks, looking around the beer hall delightedly.

Eren is pleased to have caught Zeke off guard.

"I wanted it to be a surprise," Eren replies.

Both drinking heavily, satisfied.

Eren licking his lips as Zeke says, "You and your surprises. There's no end to them!"

Zeke feels Eren's foot, playfully engage with his beneath the table.

"Do you not like them? I thought you've been having fun too."

It's a well used tactic, Eren appearing chastised and downfallen at Zeke's remark. Zeke cannot help but fall for it every time. Not wanting to hurt Eren's feelings, or have him think that Zeke doesn't appreciate all that he does for him.

"I-I am!" Zeke stutters, his face rosy, as he tries to be as assertive about that point as possible, "Having fun that is. What I mean is I like them! I do."

To hide his embarrassment, Zeke drinks some more beer.

Eren laughs at him for that, having teased him too much already. Zeke can feel Eren's socked foot move from his thigh, back down to knock at his ankle. Seeing why. Their pizza here.

"Thanks Mr Kruger," Eren says to the waiter and chef, an oldtime friend of their father's. As the seafood pizza is set down before them. Eldians may not be allowed to visit the sea, but that doesn't mean they're not allowed to purchase the ocean's bounty from Marleyans who are.

Zeke can see Mr Kruger had been very kind to add extra, extra cheese as they love.

It stretching out thick and steamy with each bite.

The pink shrimps falling inside with the cheese.

Eren tears the crust to see there's cheese in there too.

"An innovative thinker," Eren remarks, Zeke eating faster to get to the crust. Eren laughing at him, then scolding him when he burns his mouth. "Zeke..."

Zeke downs the rest of his cold beer. Eren refilling his glass for him with the pitcher.

The pizza really is so delicious, it tastes much like pizza he's had before though.

The scent of salt and decay around them, the sound of the waves. On the deck of the bow of a ship, Yelena pushing her pale blonde hair from her face as she bragged most delightedly to him that Mr Nikolo is an excellent chef. Won't Lord Zeke try the seafood pizza he made? With the freshest ingredients! The key is the lobster. Steamed to perfection!

There's lobster on this pizza too. Cooked just the same.

Hmmm.

That was weird too, wasn't it, how-

"Honestly," Eren starts, Zeke's gaze flits up to him immediately.

Eren's hands propped under his chin, as he regards Zeke.

"...I have... one more surprise for you today. Do you think you're up for it?"

Alluring is the tilt of Eren's head, the silky glimmer of his hair, each lock overlapping with the motion. Wondering. Captivating. Eren's gaze on him.

"Of course!" Zeke replies, jubilant.

Evermore so with how pleased Eren seems, even if his eyes are suddenly, but for a moment. Distant.

Like the sound of those crashing waves.

Had it been in a dream he had?

Mixed in with... some characters in a book he'd read?

Such a curse it can be, an overactive imagination, Zeke muses.

His musing tilted and thrown overboard as Eren's foot lifts back up to his leg.

"After we're done eating then," Eren tells him.

\--

Even though he'd said that.

There was still dessert to consider.

Some of the gelato Zeke hadn't been hasty enough to eat before it began to melt across his fingers (too attentive to watching Eren eat his own cone), ends up licked up by Eren's tongue. Eren shameless to do so too near the vendor they'd purchased from. Eren reassuring him that Zeke need not remain as red as an apple as he leads them through the streets. Zipping around the flow of people. Many of which are doing as they should be, returning home. The sun will set soon. The overcast of dusk beginning. Zeke frowning as its apparent their time is up, curfew will be in place soon. Even so Eren keeps leading him. Sometimes doubling back and over the way they came. Through backstreets and alleys, Zeke hadn't even known about. Zeke realising Eren is gathering them further in, then to the fringes. Nearer to the wall. 

They stop for breath, leaning against a stone wall. Older buildings closer to the boundaries of the ghetto.

Zeke listens to the sweeping broom of an old woman they'd passed to rest here, at this backstreet. She finishes up and returns through the door of her establishment. Zeke watches as Eren scoots forward, to peer around the corner cautiously. To look onto the street running right adjacent to the towering wall. That kept them in, and separated them from the rest. A discreet area no one typically goes through. Since the main gate is far from here. There are two entrances. No such thing as exits for them.

"It'll be about time soon," Eren murmurs, watching the shadow of the wall creep forward, closer to where they are already hiding in the shadows.

Zeke can't bring himself, to ask what this is all about. Only knowing it's another surprise. He doesn't want to disappoint Eren. He must not spoil everything. Even if the sun setting brings back a creeping apprehension. Zeke rests against the wall of this building as Eren readies them for whatever is coming.

His feet rather sore from his new shoes. He considers sitting down, even if it is on the ground. He'd smoke a cigarette at a time like this... if Eren hadn't made him quit. Concerned for his health, and the example they need to set for their community. Zeke smiles a little to himself at that. Eren is amazing. Always thinking of others, always thinking of Ze-

The fleeting forms of a few birds taking flight from the rooftop, catch his eye. 

Some of their sheer white feathers drift down in the last dull stream of light. Such radiance cutting through the shadow where the roofs don't touch, the laundry lines cleared of its weight, drying clothes. Zeke watches as those drifting feathers land upon the ground.

Shimmering.

Beyond that.

It's almost too dark to see.

He'd melded so perfectly in the shadows.

That figure from before.

When they'd been at the fountain, in the marketplace.

The fear Zeke had felt then, returning- delayed, paused. A skip in the projection. As he can't believe it.

The figure with his hood down this time.

Closer to them than before.

Camouflaged so easily in the dark on account of the dark crimson he's stained in. His entire body. Head to toe. Dripping, dripping, dripping, a tremendous amount of blood. It must not be his, since Zeke sees no tears or lacerations on this man's form. If he can even be called a man, his presence monstrous looming depraved despite his small stature. As if there is something more beneath the surface. Festering and raving. A darkness deeper, unfathomable. Too familiar. He cannot return, he should not return.

That nightmare, the curling remnants of it, wish to lash out and drag him back in.

"No," Zeke starts, a hollowed whisper, louder, "No!"

His body tense against the wall, as if he were trying to anchor himself to its surface. His fingers grinding down into the stone.

"Go away!" Zeke yells.

The figure of the monster remains.

A distortion in his reality.

He understands.

Even if he does not understand.

"You shouldn't be here!" Zeke screams.

Tears springing in his eyes, as he cowers in pure terror.

The light he'd thought that kept them separated. That kept him safe from it. Not anything.

The figure no longer where it had been. It is right in front of him. As if it had needed no time at all. Zeke covers his face. Whimpering as he crumples down. His legs unable to support him. He sobs into his arms.

"Big brother, big brother!" 

Gentle is Eren's voice, as are his hands. Trying to get him to look back up. Zeke terribly afraid that should he do so. Next to Eren's apprehensive face, he will also see- see it again- the bloodied visage of a monster that cannot be killed.

"Zeke. My dear Zeke. It's alright," Eren is trying to coax him, his fingers soothing through his hair. His hands settling back upon Zeke's quaking shoulders.

"We don't have to go. I'm sorry for pushing you too far."

Zeke feels Eren press a kiss to his brow. The terror shivers out from him, as he's warmed by Eren's touch. His attention and affection.

"Let's go home," Eren says to him.

Zeke looking up with his tear stricken face, gulping in air to speak.

"N-no! Where you want to go- I-I want to go with you Eren!"

On his knees Eren is upright before him. Reaching to cup Zeke's face in both his hands. Eren looks upon him and sees him, all the while not looking at him. Nor seeing him. Deep in thought. Submerged entirely. Returning only after a leisurely blink, his long eyelashes Zeke so admires framing his serene visage. 

"...then, come with me."

Eren says.

Feeling small, like a child might.

And for a moment he is exactly as one in all sense of the word. A child again.

Zeke takes Eren's hand and rising, they continue on.

\--

Covered by some rubbish, a broken and shambled cart. 

Is an opening.

Dug under the wall.

Not noticeable here, where not many pass by. Buildings or garbage blocking the way. The paths twisting and contorted to reach here. Eren glances around them, to make sure the coast is clear. The fallen dusk making it dark enough to hide their features.

Eren has Zeke go first. So Eren can hide the opening on his way through.

They emerge into a thick forest.

The trees tall, towering. Blocking the bright moon.

Zeke feeling more unnerved by the forest, than if they'd come out to a city. 

Shouldn't they have? The ghetto is within the city. Disgruntled Marleyans who despise them so the best security. There shouldn't be woods so close to them. And yet-

Well what does he know?

He's never left the ghetto.

"Follow me," Eren tells him, already knowing even in the dark where to step. The invisible path. Eren leads him through the woods as if they were his own. A break in the trees is a small clearing, with a large boulder Zeke sits upon to rest. Eren passing him the canister of water he'd packed. Moving along when they are refreshed. Back under the trees, into the dark woods. Zeke hears the familiar sound before he sees it. 

The hushed crashing, of waves hitting the shore.

The salty scent of decay, hits his nose just as their feet touch the sand. The star strewn, moon lit horizon. As two moons hang. One in the sky. One in the water. The sea black all but for the grey of the foaming waves. And the shimmering light that races across them. Echoing towards them, carried from elsewhere, propelled by the wind.

The ocean breeze glides through Eren's long hair, tickling his face as he smiles over at Zeke.

"Are you surprised?"

Zeke nods, "How..."

Eren does something else that surprises Zeke. He takes off his armband. That Zeke is almost ashamed to finally notice, had been upside down this whole time. He should have corrected it for Eren. Such a slight folly could have meant harsh discipline if it had been seen by the wrong parties. Eren reaches to take Zeke's off his arm for him. Tucking both away into his bag.

"It wouldn't be odd for two Marleyans to be enjoying the seaside at this hour," Eren reasons, he's not wrong. Not having their armbands on... or leaving the ghetto? Which of the two is worse?

Zeke finds himself not caring about either, as Eren races him to the shore.


	3. Chapter 3

They'd walked along the beach hand in hand for some time. Eren holding his shoes in the other, liking the feel of the smooth wet sand beneath his toes. Washing away the grains, the sea water that'd splashed up beneath his steps. Erasing them. Their hands part as Eren explores. Zeke too toeing his shoes off. Enjoying the cool water as well. He looks over the horizon with his feet continuously submerged and emerged in the salty water. Until Eren calls him to him. To show him what he'd brought in his bag, a small pail and tiny garden shovels, to assist them.

Together they build a sandcastle.

Zeke building some tall towers along the three circular walls Eren forms, Eren oohing and ahhing at him. For his craft. Impressed yet also teasing. In retaliation Zeke kisses at Eren's neck, causing him to giggle, Eren swatting at Zeke's arm. Telling him he'll make him fall and topple those towers if Zeke isn't careful enough. They wash their hands in the sea. Returning to admire their finished handiwork. Eren looking for small shells and dried starfish to decorate. They find a large pink conch shell Eren decides is for keeps. Washing off the sand from it in the blackened sea. The water dripped off. Eren holds it up to his ear. Listening. Then up to Zeke's.

"Do you hear anything?" Eren asks him.

A faint, slowly exhaled whistle.

Pitches against the light buzzing rising up in his hearing. Remnants of static.

Zeke shakes his head, hoping nothing is the matter again. He doesn't want to ruin their night. If Eren hadn't heard anything then he too hadn't.

"Not a thing," he replies.

Eren shrugs, briefly contemplative, as if that can't be- "Hm. Probably because we're both not sure if it'll even work."

Eren wraps the conch shell up in a towel. Setting it carefully in his bag. They'll take it back with them as a souvenir. The rest of their finds are treasures for their castle made of sand.

They walk along the shore a little further.

Eren suddenly peeling off his clothing. 

To take a swim in the sea.

Zeke following after him, making sure their clothing are tucked and secured, beneath Eren's bag. None not too close to the shore.

Meeting Eren in the water, they float amongst the moonlight.

Eren reaching his arms across Zeke's shoulders to kiss him. His usually sweet mouth tasting slightly like the sea, his dark hair slicked back from the water. The tips of the locks floating with them in the water. His tongue hot against his. Zeke's arms stretch out and rest along the slight roll of the waves traveling through.

Along with the other supplies, a large towel is what had made Eren's bag so bulky. They dry off and dress. Zeke resisting the temptation to mount Eren here by the ocean. He settles for running his hands up and down Eren's slim waist, kissing some more at his pretty neck. Especially lovely beneath the moonlight. Zeke chuckling to himself about that, knowing he thinks Eren is lovely no matter what. Eren turns to look back at him, inquisitive. So Zeke kisses him over the mouth, across his shoulder. They make out hard and heavy, Eren turning around, into his embrace. Eren's bottom lip swollen where Zeke had sucked too hard. Eren's hand in his as they walk the length of the shore from whence they came.

The night darker, as Eren leads Zeke back into the woods.

Zeke unsure how Eren could know this is the right spot.

Eren too confident.

It's eerie.

How dark it is still. And how quiet. That's what's oddest Zeke considers. And the consistently full moon. Zeke realising.

Eren's hand squeezes his, held in his.

There's that break in the trees, that cleared area they'd rested at. If they reach it again, they'll be going the same way, back to the way under the wall. Zeke squeezes Eren's hand back. Hoping Eren is taking them there. The longer they walk through the woods. Within this stifling silence, Zeke cannot help but feel this pressure. Following them. Wanting to close in.

For a feel of normalcy, a return to it. He's considered breaking the silence but that seems even worse. They might be heard. Found.

His heart thumps loudly in his breast.

What if that monster had followed them out here?

Zeke dare not glance behind him.

Knowing even if he is there, that figure.

That ghost.

Zeke would not be able to see him.

He's mustering his courage, to look once they make it to that clearing.

And once they do.

They can run.

Zeke will make sure Eren goes ahead first, so he'll be safe.

And... and then they'll go home.

Home.

He wants to be home.

At the clearing, Zeke turns around to look.

Once the moonlight hits him, washing over him again.

Nothing.

He can't see anything even with the light.

He lets out a sigh of relief.

Eren looking at him, curious.

"What's wrong? Tired? Sit here, big brother," Eren tells him, patting the flat space on the boulder. Encouraging him to take another break. Getting out his water pouch. Taking a sip first before passing it along to Zeke. Every tensed up muscle relaxing as he drinks, refreshed. Zeke laughing lightly at how scared he'd been. Scared shitless really. Eren putting away the pouch into his bag, right as Zeke is about to tell him, what that was all about-

Both startled as a light shines in their direction from a torch. It clicking off as a man emerges from the trees into the clearing. With him two other men. All of them wearing Marleyan uniforms.

"What do we have here?" the officer asks.

Zeke's jaw loosens in abject horror, Eren freezing in disbelief.

At this hour... all the way out here...?

"Two honorable citizens taking a nightly stroll? Identification papers."

The two men with the officer from the markings on his uniform, do not bother to wait for them to reply. Already searching through their pockets, patting them down. The officer, his thick curling mustache twitching with a sneer as he empties out Eren's bag onto the ground. His boot crushing the seashell Eren had wanted to take home. As he sees-

One of his men grabs hold of them, thrusting out in plain sight to see.

The armbands they'd taken off.

"Not citizens but rats huh?" the officer says, spitting.

Zeke's eyes wildly look over each of them, trying to determine the possible damage. What they can do. What will be done to them.

The officer snaps his fingers, speaking to his men, "You know what to do."

" _Please!_ " Zeke bursts out with, frantic, desperate, "Please wait!"

His tongue feeling too large as he struggles to speak, "Please don't... don't hurt my little brother! It was my fault! All my fault! I made him! _I forced him to do this!_ I made him come out here and, and I took off the armbands. It was all me! _So please!_ Punish me instead! Just me! Don't hurt him!" there's a crack in Zeke's voice. His body trembles in fear he will not even be able to do this. Praying. Wishing. So long as Eren can get away. So long as they don't beat Eren. So long as they don't kill Eren- so long as Eren is alive- _if only if Eren were still alive_ -

Eren is looking at Zeke, stricken, mortified.

Eren yelling "No! Big brother you liar!" trying to go to him. The officer holds Eren back, a gun to his chin. Tilting it up.

"Little brother?" the officer says, laughing mockingly, "I thought you were his little sister. You're too pretty, like a girl. No wonder you Eldians are such a sinful lot."

A shrug of his shoulders, as if that's just how it is, will always be.

"Alright. Why not. Just him you two."

Zeke barely has a moment to spare, to be relieved as the breath is kicked out of him. Punched out of him. Beaten out of him. His glasses broken scattered elsewhere, no, not those. A shame. From- an eye swollen shut, he coughs up blood at some point. Hearing a bone or two crack- his ribs? When their fists and steel toed boots no longer suffice, clubs are brought out. Amongst the ringing in his ears he can hear Eren is screaming. Even with the gun to his head. Zeke can't help but smile. How like Eren. That even with the risk to his own life, he doesn't care. He'll cry and howl his agony. At the injustice, the cruelty. Zeke can hear him, telling them to stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop! He'll do anything-!

The ringing in his ears stops. 

As the blows do.

The officer makes a motion with his spare hand, meaning 'up'. So the two men who'd been pulverising him to pulp lift him up. Seating him on that boulder he'd been resting on. He sees his blood on the ground, in the grass, tastes it in his mouth. Feels it dribbling down. A wheezing breath as the swirling landscape titters back upright and into focus as the officer throws Eren down. The gun pointed at his head.

"Fine," the officer tells Eren, "Same shit starts to get boring after a while. Why not entertain me with something more interesting? How about it little brother? Show me exactly how sinful you Eldians are. I need to be reminded."

Eren remains on his hands and knees, Zeke barely able to see through Eren's silky hair, his repulsed expression. Furious. Then strangely accepting and calm as he upturns his face, to look at Zeke. His eyes becoming emptier, with each wound, bruise, his gaze registers, that has been inflicted upon Zeke.

Zeke unable to stop the hitch of his body as he tries to get up. Held back by the officer's men. As Eren gives out a slight sharp cry, when the officer slaps his ass.

"Hurry up then. I need another reason to keep killing you vermin off like flies. Aha. But don't worry. For your little presentation I _promise_ you'll be an exception."

There's a peal of laughter from all of them, cruel, after the officer's sarcastic words.

A lie.

All of it-

Even if it is.

Eren decides to believe in the lie for the time they have left.

Reaching to unbuckle Zeke's belt, Eren draws closer to him. To gently take out from his clothes, Zeke's cock. Stroking it lovingly, the digits of his pretty fingers trembling, as does his chin. Eren trying not to cry. Zeke both horrified and enraged. That they would make Eren do this. In front of them to watch. A sick show for them to use as an excuse to keep torturing and murdering others of their race. Even though this sin is their own, their love is-

Zeke holds back his own tears, seeing how brave Eren is. Forcing himself to move, for both their sake, a slim chance that Zeke knows there's no way in hell. Zeke loathing himself for his weakness. Unable to prevent this, to stop this, and how even in a situation like this he finds Eren so beautiful. Alluring as his lips wrap around the tip of his cock. Just like he had on Zeke's birthday. His hot soft tongue as pleasurable now as it'd been then. Zeke grinds his teeth as he can't help himself, a wretched beast, as his cock hardens, growing taller against Eren's soft pink lips, his panting breaths. His little sighs. Eren sucking him off diligently. His slender fingers stroking what he's not yet swallowed down into his mouth. His eyes shut, his long dark eyelashes against his growing fuller cheeks. Eren moaning the harder Zeke becomes in his mouth. His chocolate brown hair swaying with each thorough suck, every bob of his head.

The laughter of the Marleyan men echoes through the woods. Ringing off with an unsure note. As Zeke is further disgusted to realise, they are deriving a different sort of pleasure than even they'd intended. Watching Eren suck him off.

"He really does look like a woman don't he?" one of the men remarks. A gun to Zeke's head. The other a knife to his throat.

"A real pretty one," the other man replies, all watching attentively as Eren struggles to bring Zeke's large and long mass down his throat. All in awe as Eren manages it.

A particularly loud slurp, has the officer tug at Eren's hair. Forcing him to take Zeke down more, rougher, quicker.

"Just like that. How about a little more you slut!"

Eren struggling to accommodate his wishes.

"You too big brother! Look how desperate little brother is for you to fuck his mouth! Surely you can do better too?"

Zeke wants to scream.

He too tries to meet the officer's demands, thrusting his hips harder up against Eren's mouth. Eren gasping and moaning, around his cock. Trying not to gag.

"Good good," the officer says, what he says after that, stunning Zeke to his cells. The core of each.

"You're not allowed to cum until the rest of us have, big brother, so wait your turn."

Numbly Zeke watches as the officer takes out a knife, and cuts from neck to thigh, Eren's clothing. Each article falling apart, down, leaving Eren's curving in back, his rolling hips, and bobbing ass- bare for all to see. All because of the moonlight. The officer pulls off what else Eren is wearing and stingingly slaps Eren's naked ass. Eren flinching, yet not pausing a second in taking Zeke's cock further down his throat. The officer whistles. Impressed.

Zeke wonders how it's possible for him to want to be sick, all while still enjoying Eren's mouth around him. His stomach flexing when Eren's brow dips and his teeth nick him, as Eren can't help but twist his hips up. The Marleyan officer laughing as he'd spread Eren's ass cheeks and plunged his cock into Eren's tight unreadied hole. Eren trying not to cry out, but failing in that. Zeke can feel Eren's cry along his cock. As Eren struggles to keep sucking him off, while flexing his hips up, jutting his ass up to meet the thrusts of the Marleyan officer's cock. Violating him. His knees digging into the dirt, as his toes do. His hands slammed down into the ground with his body stretched out as it is. His fingers clutching the grass. Zeke can feel Eren's nipples brush against his legs as Zeke continues to fuck Eren's mouth. And the officer fucks Eren's ass. Eren's whole body moving back and forth as he is penetrated on both ends.

Eren moans louder. 

Zeke wanting to cum, until he realises those moans are for the officer. Who slaps Eren's ass increasingly more violent with each plunge of his cock.

The officer unhinged, unbelieving, that fucking an Eldian could feel so good.

No doubt, because it is Eren, Zeke thinks acidly. Wanting to strangle the life out of this son of a bitch. Knowing he can't, with the gun and knife keeping him in check. Zeke's teeth grinding, a crack. On seeing Eren's full cheeks, wet with tears. The officer cumming when Eren's cock stifled sobs reach his ears.

Some of his cum spurts across the raw, red cheeks of Eren's spanked ass.

Pulling out as roughly as he'd entered. The officer does up his trousers, his belt.

His ugly face red from the pleasure he'd had, of raping Eren's tight anus.

"You can go next," he tells the man with the gun, taking his place.

Zeke wants to die.

Knowing he doesn't deserve to, given the suffering Eren is enduring on his behalf. 

Eren raped a second time.

Then a third.

As all the Marleyan men have a turn cumming inside Eren, and splattering their cum across his back and thighs. His plump ass. All of them hollering about how much Eren managed to take inside him from each of them. Such a greedy Eldian bitch they call him. Eren's thighs and legs shaking as he struggles to keep upright. His ass and hips bruised red and purple, like Zeke's body from the beating. Zeke strangles back a sob as he watches Eren force his hips to keep moving, to keep his ass on display for the Marleyans. Knowing they are enjoying looking at their handiwork. Eren still sucking on Zeke. Saliva dripping down his chin, his throat almost as sore as his thrice fucked asshole.

"Alright big brother," the officer says, panting as he watches Eren. Surely if he'd been able to get it up again so soon he'd fuck Eren some more.

"You can go ahead and cum."

Zeke had thought he wouldn't be able to, not after all that.

But then Eren looks at him. His lush green eyes moist and begging, his voice used and lips swollen. Eren moaning loudest of all for him. Eren spreading his legs, his back tense, Eren cumming for him, not the others. His blissed out expression with his mouth around Zeke's cock brings Zeke quick to climax. Eren choking as he swallows down Zeke's cum, exhausted, and also because he'd been interrupted. The officer grabbing him by his hair. Forcing Zeke to cum across Eren's face too. Some of his ejaculation dripping down onto Eren's chest. His raw nipples, and heaving chest.

"That will do I think," the officer says.

The sound of Zeke and Eren's heated panting, filling up the quiet of the woods. Zeke regretting he won't be able to hold or kiss Eren one last time before either this knife cuts his throat, or one of the Marleyans puts a bullet through Eren's-

Zeke's eyes widen as the officer further tugs at Eren's hair. Dragging him over to him. The officer tears one of the armbands. Tying it around Eren's arm tightly so it'll stay on.

Throwing the other to Zeke to pin back on. The knife gone, but the mouth of the gun pushed between his shoulder blades as they force him to stand.

"Put that on and let's go."

They allow him to make himself decent, not allowing Eren the same hospitality. Eren unable to anyway with his destroyed and trampled clothes, and his body in its current condition. They order that Zeke walk ahead of them, since the slut is having a hard time walking.

Zeke not allowed to look back, even as he hears the officer behind him and the two men berate Eren for being so slow. Slapping Eren's used ass some more, urging him to hustle or is he dragging his feet because he hasn't had enough?

Eventually they reach the entrance of the gate into the ghetto. The guard on duty there's cigarette falls from his mouth in shock, at his superior's leniency. Used to corpses in the woods.

"Caught these two without papers. Figured they're better as a reminder to the rest."

The officer laughs, laughs, laughs, Zeke wishes he'd choke on his next breath and die.

The men look Eren up and down. His face and body still drenched in their and Zeke's cum. Some of which dribbles out from his ass as all the men, the guard now included, gives his ass one more bruising slap.

"It's a befitting look for a slut like you. You better keep it all on until you get home. We'll know if you don't. Your neighbors will talk won't they?"

The officer informs Eren.

More laughter.

As they're let through the gates.

Zeke ashamed as he cries, angrily, knowing he's no right to any of these tears as Eren walks behind him slowly without a word. Allowed to wear nothing else but cum and his armband, in a display of shame.

\--

Luckily, as there are few to be curious to peer from their windows at such a late hour. Not wanting to get involved and reap unwarranted punishment for themselves.

Zeke does not think they were seen.

Grateful for that at least.

Zeke terrified when Eren had tugged at his sleeve, urging they go to the clinic instead. Which is closed but Zeke has the key for. It's closer than their home. There's more supplies there. Zeke realises hollowly. Also realising as Eren somehow gets himself into the shower there, that even after all that, Eren is thinking about him the most. Worried about his broken bones.

In his set of spare clean clothes there, Eren emerges from the shower.

Zeke rising from the bed Eren had forced him to sit on to wait.

Forced to sit back on it, as Eren pushes at his shoulders.

Eren suddenly more nimble, stronger, than Zeke had thought could be possible considering.

Getting disinfectant and bandages, gauze and ice for his wounds and bruises. Zeke wanting to treat Eren first, but he's in less shape to. Less than he thought. Not realising it'd been his anguish that'd supported his body to make it even here. Eventually relenting to all that Eren would rather, tending to him first since he's in worse for wear. Even if that is not Zeke's opinion his body moves accordingly (and sometimes not at all). Zeke feeling even guiltier. Not only had he failed to protect Eren, but even after going through such a horrifying ordeal. He was the one who was being cared for. As if the universe didn't care. Letting Eren not care for his own well being, only focused on Zeke's.

Zeke hates it.

He hates this.

All of this.

He hates himself.

Doing the best he can for Eren, after Eren is satisfied in treating him. And now that they are done, mending, licking each other's wounds. Eren lies down against him, wanting his embrace more than anything. More than even slumber, as he tucks his face to Zeke's neck. Kissing at it softly, little pecks like he would give to Zeke's cheeks when they were children. Zeke further disgusted with himself as he feels his cock grow hard. Incapable of control, smelling Eren's hair, feeling his warm skin- Zeke knows he is jealous. That all those men had been inside his pretty Eren. 

As if sensing his turmoil, Eren rises up, just enough to kiss him over the mouth. Moaning as Zeke eagerly shoves his tongue in. Wanting to feel and taste and hear more of Eren. Eren pushes at the blankets that were covering them, hitching up the shirt he's wearing. Wearing only that in an attempt to get comfortable. Eren shudders in pain, as Zeke wedges his cock between the cheeks of Eren's sore ass. Eren straddling him, atop him. As Zeke grips Eren's hips and has him jut his ass back. Giving sweet soft friction to his cock, before he slides it into Eren's swollen hole. Eren crying out loudly, wanton. His thighs spread and his hips rolling back to take Zeke's cock deeper inside him. Eren hot and tight despite having been fucked by three other cocks. Zeke grunts as he thrusts up, urging Eren to ride him harder, faster, never mind his broken bones (there'd been none, Eren had insisted, so concerned, relieved as he'd told Zeke- showering his face in kisses). Eren indulging him, wanting to please him. Eren is adorable, too lovely, Zeke thinks, unbearably greedy. Wanting more. More, more, more, more- Eren! Eren all to himself!

Eren smiles down at him, as he strokes his cheek. Zeke doing likewise to him, for him, his hand wrapping along the back of Eren's pretty neck. Eren bends forward to kiss him over the mouth again, moaning as his hips flex back, taking Zeke in to the hilt. Eren cums across Zeke's bruised abs, as Zeke ejaculates inside Eren's well fucked hole.

Eren rubs his nose to his, pressing his brow to feel his heat to his heat. Their hearts both thumping, in harmonic tempo.

"You meant it didn't you?" Eren suddenly asks, suddenly sad, "That you'll go anywhere I go?"

Zeke reaches for Eren's hands, kissing them, the right one the most.

"Anywhere."

Eren kisses his brow.

Content.

"I see," Eren says, "I'm sorry I didn't trust you then."

Eren settles against him, weighing next to nothing to Zeke. Zeke wants to bear all his burdens, all his hardships, all his suffering. Eren is his light, his joy, his salvation from this hollowed existence that is he.

And who are you?

Zeke wraps his arms around him tighter.

Eren affirming.

"Don't worry. I do now."

\--

Someone is pounding their fist against the front door.

Aggressively.

Zeke blearily opens his eyes.

Reaching for his glasses. Forgetting they are broken. Somehow despite that there is a pair for him on the nightstand. He puts them on, forgetting why he shouldn't have been able to. Zeke gets out of bed. Bewildered that they're in the clinic. Remembering. Faithful fear returns to stretch within him. As he considers, the Marleyans are back to punish them some more.

That must be who is at the door.

They must have been followed or reported on, and it'd been seen they had not gone all the way to their residence as ordered. Zeke tries not to panic. Sucking in measured breaths to calm himself enough. This time. He'll protect Eren. He won't let anymore harm befall him. Zeke goes into their father's office and unlocks the hidden drawer. A loaded gun held in there. Probably for a time like this. Eren doesn't know about it. 

Zeke takes off the safety and heads towards the waiting room. A finger to the trigger.

Maybe he should have tried calling their parents, to warn them. Little good that'll do if the door is breached first, the phone lines probably already bugged anyway.

Not walking right before the door, at an angle instead, in case they hear him coming and shoot him through it.

That reminding Zeke of something else-

Right through it before, a different door, there'd been- a blade... going through the wood. Through him,

The banging abruptly stops.

Zeke bracing himself as he prepares for them to break down the door.

He'll shoot as many as he can.

Oh, shouldn't he have woke Eren? Will the gunshots do that?

No time to curse his foolishness.

Zeke unsure why.

The door is not being broken down, instead the doorknob is rattled.

Someone is trying to get in. They cannot come in.

All the hair stands on Zeke's body as it comes back to him.

That night, that boyish voice calling through the door, for Eren to come out.

Zeke slowly approaches the door closer than he'd planned, the gun lowering. His mouth gone dry, a buzzing in his ears until the doorknob rattling stops.

Complete silence.

His pulse slowing as it seems.

Everything has stopped.

Zeke's arms relax, his finger moves off the trigger.

Certain there are no Marleyan police to have followed them.

And that unnatural voice from the day before- whatever it had belonged to.

It's gone.

That figure today in the market-

Coldness seeps back into Zeke's body in a flash, as his head jerks up. The presence behind the door not the same, but akin to the figure he realises. As the banging starts again as abruptly as it had stopped, louder than before more violent than before that Zeke doesn't understand how the wood hasn't already cracked. Bending forward as if it will explode any second, with any hit. Rapid and vicious. Whoever is on the other side does not ask to be let in but is demanding it. Only ceasing to pound the door to ram at the handle. Persistent. It sounds like whoever, whatever is on the other side will hack through the door.

"Stop it!" Zeke yells, the gun held back up.

"Leave us alone!"

Silence falls, his voice heard.

The once quaking door stills.

Zeke can tell they have not left, their menacing aura seeping through the cracks. Beneath the door, around the door. An ache begins in his bones, his body, his brain.

"Whoever you are, you're not welcome here!" Zeke bellows out, hoping despite that, that he won't wake Eren up. Somehow knowing that if Eren wakes up now, something terrible will happen.

When Zeke assumes the pounding will resume.

"...give him back..." a voice says, not like last. Coolly melodic and feminine. 

When Zeke does not reply.

"...give Eren back to us..." it persists, tired and sad. Lonely and desolate. Zeke knowing he too would sound as such if he did as asked.

Which is why.

"Eren is staying here with me! He chose me!" Zeke shouts, since it is true.

No answer.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


No answer.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
THE DOOR POUNDED AT AGAIN, READY TO FLY OFF THE HINGES, THE WOOD SMARTENING WITH A DENT AND CRACK, THE LOUDEST OF ALL THE DOORKNOB. HACKED CLEAN OFF. A GAPING HOLE LEFT IN ITS PLACE.

Even so the door does not move, cannot open.

Zeke doesn't know what compels him to do it.

He hunches forward, to peer through the hole of where the doorknob once was.

Knowing the buildings he can see, are not the buildings he should.

A different place, a different time.

The view of them blocked as the figure on the other side of the door crouches down to look through the hole of the door too.

Staring back at him.

Her dark blue eyes glare into his, wide and unforgiving, boring into his soul his flesh his mind his being as that figure had. Her black hair partially obscuring her pale face, her teeth gnashing as she looks upon him, resentful.

Her pretty voice etched with a scream as she seethes at him.

" _YOU DAMN THIEF!_ GIVE EREN BACK TO US!"

She draws back, her fingers reaching in to scratch at the wood of the door on his side. As if she doesn't understand why the door won't open. Why there is a door.

Zeke raises the gun.

A voice calls out to the young woman.

"Mikasa get away from there!"

He pulls the trigger.

Her arm and hand drawn back. The bullet lodges itself into the wood. Sealed into it as the door mends itself. The broken off doorknob reemerging to the surface, to replace the one that'd fallen on the other side. Of where? Where was that? Zeke trembles in terror. 

Remembering he'd seen that place on the other side of the door from his nightmare.

\--

He'd gone back to bed, he recalls.

Eren sound asleep next to him.

A lecture surely in store for them, he thought, when their father arrives in the morning to start opening up. Zeke once more bewildered as he wakes up. Not on the white sheeted clinic bed but on a long green cushioned couch. In his and Grisha's office. His father at work at his desk, scribbling away on some documents. Hearing the creak of the springs, turns back to look at him. Passing Zeke his glasses as he rises, coming to.

"Good morning," Grisha says, with a wry smile, as if amused at Zeke's confusion. Writing it off as grogginess.

Cupping a hand round his mouth, "He's awake! Eren!" Grisha calls out. It must be after clinic hours. For Eren to be free to hurry to him. The pitter pat of his footsteps, causing Zeke's heart to throb. A delirious throb as Eren's apprehensive face dissolves into relieved tears.

"It wasn't that serious was it?" Grisha is saying, thinking Eren's reaction overkill but not at all surprised by it as Eren throws his arms around Zeke.

Eren kissing at Zeke's face, Zeke making sure he misses the lips. Since they're in front of their father. Zeke thumbs the tears out from Eren's eyes, Eren almost in his lap.

"I was so worried about you!" Eren tells him, "When daddy called to tell me you were here at the clinic I almost didn't believe him..."

Huh?

"What?" Zeke says aloud.

"You must have been sleepwalking again," Grisha adds, Eren untangling himself from Zeke to rush about. Fetching him his tablets and a glass of water.

"You didn't take your medicine last night. And when I woke up this morning you weren't in bed," _with me_ goes left unsaid, no doubt heartbroken, from the wobble of Eren's chin. His voice. Zeke feels terrible. Emotionally, physically, mentally.

"Wait... what?" Zeke tries again, trying to make sense of this.

Eren sits next to him. His shoulder brushing up against his.

"Here, take your medicine. You'll feel better."

Zeke... does as he's told.

Eren soothingly running a hand along his arm, after he's done so.

"You must have sleepwalked all the way to the clinic and then laid down here on the couch in the office. You've been asleep this whole while. I was worried you wouldn't wake up."

Eren rests his head to Zeke's shoulder, Zeke not entirely understanding.

"I thought... last night you were here too," Zeke says, sure of it. Last night he did go to the clinic. And Eren was there. Eren had been with him here too... because of that awful awful thing that had happened... as Zeke feels further out of touch, out of reach. He considers. That perhaps he had not woken up to reality, and that horrible night had happened. That was his reality and this right now was him dreaming, wishing it had never happened. What a pathetic wretch he is. Eren had to endure all that suffering and he got off scotch free! He can't forgive himself! Zeke suddenly stands up, alarming both Eren and Grisha.

He unbuttons his shirt. His confusion a cavity in his existence as he sees the familiar bruises from last night's brutality on his body.

"You _were_ here last night Eren," Zeke says to him, tugging at his arm to bring him to his feet. Eren doing so obediently. Zeke turns him around, so his back is facing him. Eren's turn to be confused.

"I'll prove it," Zeke insists, reaching to unbuckle Eren's belt. He pulls down his trousers.

Shock coursing through him.

On seeing Eren's smooth skin, unmarred by any bruises or welts.

His plump ass bare and pristine.

Grisha yelling and averting his eyes, "Still asleep are you Zeke?!"

Eren whirls back around to face Zeke.

And slaps him across the face.

\--

They're walking home finally.

Zeke carrying the apology gift castella from the bakery they'd stopped by- in the bag in one hand, Eren's hand in the other.

Eren continues to shoot him a glare. Regardless. Of the amount of times he's apologised.

"I was confused is all. I'm sorry Eren."

"Right in front of our father!" Eren brings up for the nth time, his cheeks heating at the memory.

"I thought you'd been injured too," Zeke mutters, glum.

Apparently on his way out of their house last night Zeke had made a horrible mess, bumping into things. Which is why he was all banged up. Eren had had to clean up that mess too. Atop of all this...

They arrive home at last, Zeke feeling some of the tension leave his body as he follows Eren in. Setting the cake on the counter. Zeke tries to scrounge up some words, at a loss as to what to say, what he should say.

"...should I make some coffee? Would you... like the cake now?"

Eren is frowning at him, disapprovingly. Knowing Zeke is trying to bribe his way out of this. Then seeing how chastised his brother is, decides to have mercy on him. Sighing. Like he can't stay mad at him for long anyway. Eren reaches for his apron.

"We can have it after dinner."

Eren shooing him out of the kitchen until he wants him to set the table, Zeke listening to the radio in the meanwhile. He turns the volume down low as he sets the plates. Eren's cold shoulder melted. As he carries over the steaming hot foods, one of Zeke's favourites. Spaghetti with clams. Eren must really have forgiven him. Zeke happy about that as he's typically the one who likes to hurry to kiss and make up. 

Eren pours the crimson coloured wine. Zeke thinking it'd be odd to drink red with this, blinks and sees he'd been mistaken. It surely is a white variety that Eren is pouring.

After dinner, the dishes cleaned in a tag team of both of them. Zeke puts on a pot of coffee as they listen to a baseball game. Playing a few round of cards as well. When the coffee is ready, Eren cuts the light and soft castella cake to have with it.

A nice evening Zeke thinks, glad to have made up with Eren.

The deck of cards put away, the dirty cups and plates from their coffee time soaking in the sink as Eren suggests they enjoy the sunset. Playing a game of catch outside during it with Zeke's new mitt, his new bat, an old well used baseball also a gift from- Mr Xavier right? Eren remarks, as if reading Zeke's mind. That's right Mr Xavier had been a mentor of his... he'd taught him how to pitch a ball... had given him these glasses and-

Zeke has to reach far to catch the ball Eren had hit. Eren not hitting too hard. The real purpose of their game, unlike actual baseball is for Zeke to catch what Eren hits. Eren hitting the ball back from Zeke's easy throws.

Once the sun has set they return into the house.

For their nighttime bath, Eren requests he wash his hair for him again, as they soak together.

Eren washing his back for him, marveling at the muscles there. Saying it's a shame he doesn't play baseball more. They'll try to play more games together... another time won't they? Eren suggests. Zeke chuckling at how cute Eren is. Worried about a thing like that. Zeke promising him, of course they will.

When Zeke asks Eren for his medicine, wanting to make sure he takes it and they don't have any problems tonight. Eren shakes his head.

"Not tonight," Eren tells him.

They're otherwise ready for bed, comfortable upon it, the blankets drawn back. Zeke unable to draw them over them as Eren crawls into his lap. Pressing him against their pillows. Dipping forward, his long dark hair shielding Zeke from the dim starlight that's flickering above. Outside their window. Zeke rests a hand against Eren's slim neck as Eren presses his mouth over his. Passionate, and demanding. His hands unbuttoning Zeke's nightshirt so he can feel and touch his chest.

Eren pulling his shirt off from his shoulders.

"Let me feel all of you," Eren requests, Zeke expecting likewise, takes off Eren's nightwear. His little dress pulled off, revealing each curve- his small waist and wide hips. Zeke remembering such immaculate hips had been under his hands the night previous. Bruised and manhandled. A shudder runs through him, of both revulsion and pleasure. Eren not minding as he straddles him. His cute perked nipples rubbing to Zeke's chest as he moans into his mouth. Eren's thick thighs clamp about his waist. The underside of his small hard cock rubs to Zeke's abs. Zeke reaches down and around, dizzy and delighted to fill his hands up with Eren's plump ass. His touch rougher than usual, as he's not entirely sure why, he wants to mark it. Eren's skin, Eren's flesh. Every inch of him. To prove they're here together and Eren is all his. Eren chose him! Him!

Sharp and pained, is Eren's gasp from Zeke's possessive gripping touch. Eren flexing his hips back and forth for Zeke anyway. Letting Zeke knead his asscheeks in however manner he likes. The furrowed dip of Eren's brow, adorable, like his parted lips. Always seeking Zeke's. Wanting another kiss, another- so sweet Zeke thinks. 

His cock large and erect, his blood pulsing fire in his veins as Eren rubs and ruts and runs his body his skin his scent against him. Zeke takes in a stuttered breath as Eren reaches for his cock. His hand wrapping around the shaft. Tentatively Eren scoots up, to place Zeke's cock between the cheeks of his ass. Sore and red from Zeke's touch. Zeke can feel Eren has already prepared himself, slick and wet and hot is his crack, Zeke's throbbing cock nestles bulging between the cheeks of Eren's ass. The veined skin of his member rubbing against Eren's tight and puckered anus. Teasing Eren, as Eren teases Zeke- as he had last night Zeke would insist. But he doesn't want them to fight anymore. Eren doesn't remember. Had it even happened? What happened? What is going on

Eren brings him back to the sweet present.

Eren ruts back against his cock fervently. His soft little cries pitching as the friction isn't enough. He wants Zeke inside him inside him inside him inside him inside him finally finally finally forever forever forever forever forever with

"Not yet?" Eren asks, looking over Zeke's flushed face, their mingled, merging sweat, as their naked bodies rock against each other's, "You don't want to come inside me yet?" Eren is asking. Practically pleading.

Zeke flustered. He'd assumed Eren would take him inside him when he was ready. He didn't know that Eren wanted his approval. That Eren was waiting for him. Zeke feels ashamed, given how much Eren wants it. His begging, beseeching eyes, shimmering emeralds, a throb from Zeke's temple to his cock. As he beholds how lovely his Eren is. His light brown skin, sunkissed and blessed, smooth and lovely against Zeke's own under any light, any shadow. His silky dark hair that keeps tickling his shoulders, his full pink lips Zeke kisses hungrily at. Eren kissing him back just as hungry. His hands move from Eren's wide hips to cup his face, kissing him harder, harder- stealing his breath, his sanity.

"Do you want me?" Zeke asks, as if he cannot believe it. As if it were impossible for him. He's not worthy.

Eren nods. At his limit, anticipation teeters at the edge, as Zeke kisses and bites at his neck. His hands running back down Eren's waist, teasingly, achingly, before latching back around his hips. Zeke enjoying the movement of them. Sickly too he enjoys, Eren's desperation. He needs this. He wants to hear it. Eren realising such when Zeke has not yet entered him.

"Please big brother!" Eren cries out, begging, "I want you! I want you Zeke! I want you inside me!"

Delirious, from Eren's sweet words.

Zeke trembles, in happiness. Such happiness oozes and outshines, all pleasure, all carnal desire. A mad bite to come, when it seeps into all and all becomes one. As he and Eren will be.

Eren kisses him harshly, biting at his lips, his neck. His thighs spreading wide for him, hitched up so Zeke can better position his cock. Can feel Eren's trembling hole, his whole body ready. Eren practically screaming.

"My dear big brother! I want you to fuck me!"

The breath knocked out from Eren as he sees stars.

Zeke flipping them around, Eren's back to the mattress, so he can push his cock inside Eren to the hilt. First thrust. By rolling Eren with him, Eren beneath him. His slim legs up in the air, his feet kicking into it as his toes spread and Zeke's large cock pounds into him mercilessly. Its long length would have easily reached Eren's core even without resorting to such a tactic. But Zeke wants to leave no room for argument that he'll fuck Eren's hole real good. As much as Eren wanted. Eren's hickey covered neck arching back as Eren cries out repeatedly. His hips gyrating up into each of Zeke's thrusts, his big brother's hands no longer bruising about his hips, wanting Eren to move them as he sees fit, wild and untamed. Instead they are bruising about his ass, feeling it up. Zeke grunting as Eren's fatty flesh fills up and overflows against his fingers, as his cock fills it up. Eren's hole tight and slick from his desire. 

Zeke fucks Eren raw.

Eren's voice raw as he continues to scream in pleasure, Zeke's cock inside him so good. Perfect. Belongs here, inside him. Zeke belongs inside him. Welcome home.

Eren's fingers dig into Zeke's back, a trail of red as Zeke grunts above him. Fulfilled as he fulfills Eren.

Zeke's mouth ravenous against Eren's breasts as he sucks and bites there too, moving back up to leave marks upon the marks he's made on Eren's neck. A loop of red and purple around it, proving Eren is his- as Eren's thighs clench at his hips, his ankles crossing, the heels of his feet brushing alongside Zeke's ribs. Eren less willing for Zeke's cock to leave him. Wanting less of the length's departure only more of the tip's arrival, banging against his prostate. Banging, banging, banging, knocking, knocking, knocking- ah ah Ah Ah AH Anh AHN! So good! So fucking good! That's what Eren's flushed happy blissed out face tells him as Zeke fucks him more, harder. Zeke grunting atop him, delirious with desire. Eren holding him against him. Zeke wishes he could knock Eren up. Eren's fingers brush through Zeke's golden hair, clutching at it as his anus clenches around Zeke's cock and he cums.

"AhhhhhhhhhH! _Zeke!_ " Eren cries out.

His semen splatters onto their bellies, against their chests, as Zeke's cum spurts inside him. Filling him up. A step to completion. The end.

Eren smiles at him, all the joy in the world to be had for them in this moment. The room full with their panting, the starlight dim, the moonlight hidden by the clouds. Not to matter, nothing compares to Eren's radiance. The feeling Zeke has of comfort, belonging, home. When he is with him. When they touch like this, skin to skin, heart to heart. Mind to mind. Their fingers are entwined, their hands coming to clasp that last second before they'd cummed together.

Together forever they will remain.

I'm home.

"You really did it," Eren tells him, rubbing his nose to his. His pretty eyelashes fluttering, too lovely. Eren's beauty, the glow of his postclimax, the sweat gliding off his skin like diamonds. Eren the prettiest jewel of all.

Eren's hand grips his harder, Zeke answers with a grip just as hard in return.

Zeke rolls off from Eren. Eren reluctant for him to pull out, wanting to savour the moment a little longer. But Zeke needs to lie down. Tired. Exhausted. Yet also. Happy and content. Sated.

Still catching his breath.

"I'm, I'm gunna sleep well tonight huh," he tells Eren. Eren kissing him across the lips, gently, then wetly. Zeke's satisfied groan making Eren moan. When their mouths part, Eren giggles against his neck with his wet lips.

Reaching over to kiss Zeke's brow.

His hand strokes Zeke's cheek.

Eren's disposition as Zeke sleepily blinks, his eyelids growing heavy. Oddly melancholy, as he continues to gaze at Zeke, with every ounce of his affection. Admiring him. Zeke realising Eren is marveling over him much like Zeke does over him.

"See you on the other side, big brother," Eren tells him, gently, and gentler he says with another good night kiss, ah how Zeke loves Eren's soft lips, "Sweet dreams."

Eren snuggles up against him, wanting to be held in his arms.

Zeke manages to wrap them around him. For tonight, his embrace is not tight enough.

Despite that.

For the first time in a while, Zeke falls asleep with a smile on his lips.


	4. Chapter 4

And for the first time ever.

This time when he wakes he is not afraid.

Eren had been in bed with him, but he is no longer here.

The white sheets tightly cover Zeke, his head to the pillow. His body centered on the bed. It was not the same bed as before but it is still his bed. The bed he'd slept in in the real Liberio.

Zeke opens his eyes to the near dark.

Sitting up, he reaches for his glasses.

Putting them on he can see better.

Eren is at the foot of the bed, facing him.

But Zeke cannot see his face.

His hair covers it up. His head leaning forward. His body is odd. Slacked. As if he were not awake. His body a mere husk. A lure. He hangs. All his limbs reaching downwards. His outfit as white as the bed sheets.

Calmly Zeke gets out of bed.

Eren taller than him, but not taller than him. His feet a few inches from the floor. His hanging body floating as if by strings. But there are no strings. Zeke watches as Eren turns around. A line of red seen at the back of his neck, disappearing under his parted hair.

He glides away.

Out their bedroom, through the hall.

Down the stairs.

Turning to the entrance way.

Zeke follows after him. 

Losing sight of him once he turns.

At the entrance way Zeke sees their door is open.

The familiar sound of waves reaches his ears, louder as he approaches the doorway.

A peculiar scenery beyond it.

The dark waters of the sea, hitting along the sandy shores. Green trees and their branches shifting amongst the wind. The decayed salty scent the same yet not the same. This is not the shore he and Eren had visited beyond the ghetto walls. It is another shore.

The shore on the other side of that shore.

A shore he also knows.

Zeke steps out, onto the sand.

His feet bare.

He looks down.

He is wearing sweats as white as Eren's outfit, as white as his bed sheets.

Zeke looks around.

Their house is still there, floating here at the shore. The door of the exit way still open. But Zeke has no reason to go back. They've already decided. 

He turns back around, hoping to see where Eren has gone.

Spotting footsteps in the sand, Zeke decides to follow them.

He walks.

Along the dark shore.

The dark waters washing his feet and eventually the footsteps.

When there are no more.

He looks up.

There is a little girl.

Her hair as gold as his.

She too appears to have stopped, for the same reason as he.

There are no more footsteps for her to follow.

"Excuse me," Zeke starts, feeling too loud here on the path, where the stars blur in multitude, in silence. The only sound the crashing of the waves in this quiet place.

"I'm looking for my little brother, have you seen him?"

The little girl turns to him, her clothes as worn as her despondent expression.

Her whole body turns with her.

Zeke crouches down, as Eren had to his patients. Children like her.

"He doesn't look anything like me," Zeke begins to tell her, ready to tell her more but she is already nodding. She does not look at him. She turns back around. Zeke rising to his feet.

The little girl with her hair gold as wheat, points.

In the direction she too should have been headed.

"Thank you..." Zeke says, unsure, even more unsure. When she passes to him, looking at him this time with her tired eyes. A bucket. Zeke accepts it, not sure why. "Thank you..." he says again.

He starts to walk in the direction she had pointed. The bucket at hand.

He glances back.

She is still standing there, watching him.

He walks some more.

Zeke glances back a second time. After a great deal of distance.

He sees she is still standing there, watching him.

He does not look back a third time.

The shore curving to an expanse of it he has not yet seen.

Zeke stops to pick up a large pink conch shell.

He washes it off in the ocean and places it in the bucket.

He walks.

And walks.

And walks.

Walks.

Zeke stops again.

Full of hope.

When he spots the half formed sand castle.

The circular walls, three in total, within each other- the same as Eren had formed. The only thing missing the towers. Zeke puts the bucket to good use and with water for the sand, he crouches down to get to work. Building those towers Eren had so been impressed by. 

He cannot say if hours have passed since he started building, or since from even when he'd started trying to find Eren. As the night remains, the full moon unmoving across the shimmering waves. Will it be night here forever?

So long as Zeke can meet Eren again, he doesn't mind.

Even if it means he must follow the path for eternity.

Zeke reaches into the bucket, to take out the large conch shell he'd picked up. Water drips from it. Examining it. He wonders if he should leave it here, or somewhere else along the path, for Eren to find and know he is waiting for him.

The pink stretches out into white, the colour of the shell inside. 

Also red, as it drips out from Zeke's throat.

A blade cut through his neck.

Zeke unable to scream, gasping as he struggles to turn around.

Falling to his knees.

Horrified most of all, the bloodied seashell falling from his grasp. Knocking down a tower. He too unable to not crush some of their sand castle beneath him as he faces his attacker.

The hood of his green mantle lowered, his figure no longer seeped in blood. The face as he knows it, off, with the scars embedded across one side of his face.

"I told you I would catch up to kill you," Levi says.

Glaring at him once more with all the hatred in the world, exactly as he had in the market and before then before before before before

"Enough of this bullshit Zeke," Levi says, his patience worn thin, "You know who I am don't you? Let's cut to the chase. I'm sick of waiting."

The sort of fear in Zeke's eyes can only be from memory, not ignorance.

"Eren had me wait all this damn fucking time because he said you weren't ready, well you're ready now ain't you? So go ahead and drop dead!"

Levi flourishes the other sword in his hand as if the one he'd put through Zeke's neck had not been enough. Zeke gasps and wheezes mutedly, unable to do much else as he bleeds and bleeds and bleeds over the sand.

"Please Captain Levi," Zeke jumps, on hearing Eren's voice. An echo. Distant.

Both he and Levi looking down as they realise his voice had come from the blood stained conch shell.

"You promised you'd help me," Eren is chiding Levi. Levi scowling, caught, "Oh. Heard all that did you? Can you hurry it up over there? I'm sick of this nasty ass sand. Had enough of it already when that dead- my bad- not dead brat over here decided to give me back my damn hand with it. What the fuck. Enough of this titan shenanigans."

Eren's silence on the other side is paused, even irritated.

Keeping his temper in check.

"I asked you to simply keep an eye on him."

"My hand slipped... being made outta sand and all," is Levi's snarky reply, deadpan as usual.

Zeke knows what Levi is talking about. Having had a similar experience. That girl then...

"We'll be ready soon. Though I don't know how your indulgence will factor into things," Eren tells Levi, rather short. Zeke would laugh at Levi but it's not really a possible feat. Levi rolls his eyes, sliding the blade out from Zeke's throat.

Far along the shore, the opposite direction Zeke had come from. The direction Levi had been, they can see a figure walking.

At first it appears to be the devil they speak of, her hair gold as wheat.

As the figure wavers, and approaches closer-

"Shit," Levi snaps at Eren who has also come to visit the path, "Hey Eren. _We're_ supposed to be getting the hell _outta_ here ain't that right?"

Eren is frowning at Levi, picking up sand from his and Zeke's half crushed sandcastle. He rebuilds Zeke's throat with it. Zeke leaning against him. Supported by him. The first thing he says, happy, tearful, with the function of his vocal box returned is- "Eren!"

Eren smiles over at him, relieved he can speak now.

"Captain Levi is so mean isn't he?" Eren tells him, that same slight smile in place. Then turning to Levi, his frown resumed and somewhat perplexed, "Captain did you forget? I have to come to take you back home."

Levi did totally forget, his sour face and unapologetic 'tsk' says it all.

"Hold my hand," Eren tells him, Zeke grasps it firmly. As he should have, if only Gabi had not taken Eren's head. Zeke wondering about that, "I'll explain when we're back over there," Eren informs him. Zeke starting to understand already.

Eren turns to Levi with his other hand, "Captain Levi."

Levi taking it in his.

The stars fall down.

When Zeke closes his eyes.

Those stars gather to form the grains of sand that make up their sandcastle.

At the top of the stairs of the tallest tower, Zeke meets Eren there. Grasping both his hands in his, they go out to the rooftop. He holds Eren in his arms, and they sway together in the moonlight, their combined heartbeat all the music they need.

Until the symphony can start.

\--

When Zeke opens his eyes.

He's lying down. Turned onto his back that had once been blown to bits. 

His head resting upon Eren's naked lap. Zeke too, partially so. Eren is smiling down at him, brushing his fingers through his hair gently.

"You're finally awake," Eren says. Captain Levi with his arms folded, scoffs.

"After a thousand shitting years," Levi says, Eren glancing over at him with a look Zeke can only half see. It enough for Levi to leave. Zeke wondering how he can get out of here. Follows the information he forms, step by step, some his own deduction. The rest filled in blanks from Eren's touch, his thoughts, transferred to him by his touch. Sparks running between them. 

When Eren's head had rolled into Zeke's hand.

Eren had kept his consciousness stored in his brain, unlike Reiner who once in dire straits as the Armor Titan had transferred his consciousness to below his neck to survive. The reason Eren had done that, was in order to save Zeke, who could no longer move. Betting on the gamble that once Zeke touched his spinal fluid, he would absorb some of it through his skin. The contact thus enough for them to combine their minuscule strength. Utilising Zeke's royal blood to its utmost advantages. The bet had paid off. That one touch enough. That even though Zeke had lost consciousness, Eren was able to shield them both. From Eren's blown head, he'd quickly tapped into his harden ability. Pooling out from where he'd been severed. Encasing them in a layering, hardening wall of crystal. Connecting it to the already made wall since the technique was much the same only without the titans within; and sealing the gap once more. As he regained his strength through the light absorbent light crystal, he regrew his body, and began to heal Zeke's.

Across the inner walls, to make it more comfortable and quicken the regeneration, Eren had also expanded his titan flesh within. Making it warm, and able for them to last without sustenance the amount of days they had. Captain Levi even relying on Eren's method too, reluctantly. Making contact with the red wet flesh with his skin. Probably why he'd manifested on the other side.

When Captain Levi had first showed up Eren had been sure they would be finished off... Levi appearing during one of those times Eren had been asleep over there but awake here. Captain Levi had traveled through one of the tunnels in the walls (Hanji in a different tunnel), that just so happened to connect to the part of the wall where they are. Dropping in from a hidden door. Levi wanting to know what the hell was going on. Eren explained his plan to him thus, and amazingly Levi had decided to support it. Even telling Eren should the retreating Marley forces outside or their own come whirling and bombing at them (oh shit they were doing that huh?) ...and should they manage to break through- then Levi would protect him. Oh, but not Zeke though. So Eren should be done with his shit by then.

Eren had accepted Levi's offer, even if his stakes from the Hammer Titan were doing a good job to deter most violence against his walls. The Survey Corps trying their best to get near. Armin and Mikasa the only ones to manage without getting skewered.

In the beginning, Eren did not think it would take too long to do what he must do. Zeke should have been able to regain consciousness as soon as his body had healed to a certain extent, but he did not wake even after his body was in perfect shape.

Content in the dream, the scenarios Eren had come up with to make him more comfortable, overly successful. Eren trying his best to piece from his own memories and Zeke's memories he was rifling through, a beautiful world for them. Unfortunately, because it was not reality, but a shadow born of the real path. Their own traumas.

It was not a stable world. 

And it was not always a kind world.

Zeke's own ideas had even begun to infringe Eren's as he started to comprehend something was not right. There'd been a lot of mistakes, discrepancies on Eren's part. Not helping the instability. The off time. The missing pieces that could not be gathered back up. Some rather to be left abandoned. The ghosts of their different yet connected pasts. Only the dead and the reborn could exist there. So even while Zeke would start to remember others he knows. Because they're still alive in this world, Eren could not bring them into the other one. On that note, individuals Eren was not familiar with, having not picked up on that memory of Zeke's yet- were something too he would have trouble with.

Some falsehoods had been true, and others only what they really are. Recollections. Wishes. Feelings.

Their presence on this other side genuine, not just bystanders watching, a mishmash of experiences again through the whirling lens- all possible by the Founder's powers.

All possible because they had made contact.

Zeke with this new clarity, is disgruntled by his sudden reentered confusion. Stuck within it for so long. No matter the bliss and agonies it wrought. He had been the one who had not wanted to leave... and yet in the dream it was Eren who had kept him there... Eren also needed more time, wanted more time. Why?

Eren looks a touch flustered at that, Zeke realising right away. Feeling foolish. Then smug. Eren like he, had wanted to stay in the dream longer. He'd wanted that sort of happiness with Zeke... he didn't want it to end. So he'd told a white lie to Captain Levi, that the reason Zeke would not wake was because he wasn't ready, wasn't strong enough. It was a good excuse, for they need strength for the rumbling.

"How... how did you convince Levi to agree to the rumbling?" Zeke muses aloud, wanting to know too, why Levi is helping Eren. His frown displeased, only momentarily. As he comes up with his own ideas. Eren giggling at him, leaning forward to kiss his brow. His hands still gently cradling his head.

"It was easy," Eren replies, Zeke's brow lifts in surprise.

"No way... did you use the Founder's powers?" since those of the Ackerman line cannot help but be compelled to obey the king.

Eren shakes his head, "No. As cruel as he's been to you. Captain Levi made this decision on his own without my interference."

Eren's smile, slight, seems to say it's ironic, "Just like how I decided to trust you..."

A tender throb of his heart, as Eren continues, "You felt really guilty didn't you? At first you were totally convinced I was only going along with your plan because your royal blood had somehow taken hold of my mind."

Eren bends forward to kiss Zeke over the lips, "Don't fear. My heart is my own Zeke. "

Zeke can't help but tease Eren at that, "Huh? I thought your heart is mine Eren."

Eren flushes beautifully at Zeke's quip.

"Oh! Uhm, well... that too..." 

Eren pouts at him as Zeke laughs, boisterously. His mirth rumbling through him to his toes.

"You were having the same thoughts as I was. I should have realised sooner," Zeke tells Eren, grateful that even as a failure as a big brother, Eren still looks to him like one- but also- "You too were worried that the Founder's powers were influencing me and you were using me. Isn't that also right?"

"Yes..." Eren admits, Zeke sitting up, reaches to cup Eren's red cheek, "We're both so foolish... big brother..."

Eren's breath intoxicating, as he breathes against his mouth. Zeke kisses Eren deeply, hungrily. Even though the one who will be devouring, will be Eren.

Zeke in love with every inch of Eren, every second of him, every part and every version of him.

Eren who had waited for him. Eren wanting to make sure he gives Zeke exactly what he wants. Eren who wants what Zeke wants.

"I'm ready, my sweetheart," Zeke says, once their lips part, their breath partially caught. Eren looks torn. Wanting to stay in Zeke's embrace a little longer. Yet ready too, to embrace their forever.

The rumbling may start at any time they will it.

Before that, Zeke wants to make sure he keeps his word to Eren.

"I'm going to save you," Zeke tells him, with every ounce of tenderness he carries for his beloved, their hands clasped, "I'll protect you forever. My dear little brother. I love you."

"Yes. I know you will," Eren replies, drawing his fingers out from Zeke's. Those of his right hand. Eren raises it up to bite.

"See you again soon, my dear big brother."

The blood spurts as the crystal walls crack.

Steam rises.

The Attacking Titan devours the holder of the Beast Titan.

Humanity stands at the threshold of oblivion.

\--

Captain Levi swerves about expertly.

Dodging the rubble. 

Flickering, flying forth with his gear. Quick as a sparrow. Landing, jumping about the once piercing thorns of the Hammer Titan, he zig zags through them and along the partially crumbling wall.

Climbing to the top. He decides to risk it. His wires whirling out to attach to Eren's shoulder. The titan different. Beneath the full moon, risen high above, Eren's Attacking Titan had transformed. Into the new Beast Titan Levi surmises. No longer resembling an ape, is instead a wolf. Levi lands his boots against dark grey fur instead of skin.

"Hey Eren, can you hear me?"

Levi says, almost rolling his eyes at himself. No shit Eren can hear him, with these big ears of his. How did it go again grandma?

Eren's bright green eyes shift over to look at him in the corner of his vision. His teeth bared, a little snarl Levi's answer.

Levi looks back with Eren to the horizon.

They see Marley is regrouped with reinforcements, their enemy's allies on their way. No doubt much more are marching across their homeland, to cross the sea, or to fly over through the air. Levi clicks his tongue, as he sees some of those bastards already nearby, soaring through their skies.

Hearing Eren intake a deep breath, Levi shoots up a flare to warn his reluctant comrades. The least he can do before he covers his ears. Guessing what may be next.

A loud bellowing howl.

The walls cracking beneath them and all around them, lightning pulses and crackles down from the skies. Releasing. Awakening the slumbering titans within the walls. The time has come. The world will end. The Rumbling begins.

Eren leaps out from the wall as it falls beneath his claws. 

The fortification of Colossal titans set to crush and scorch the earth.

Their enemies will all fall beneath them.

The titans throw rocks, release steam, and catch the flying invaders mid flight. Smashing them into dust, or burning them to a crisp. Eren leaps back onto the rubble of the walls. Making sure each titan has awakened.

Running, running, running... along the fallen walls. 

The bird in the cage set free.

He howls a requiem towards the fiery horizon.

\--

In the distance, far across the sea, they can see that Marley is burning.

Some of their battleships too. 

From when a couple of the many Colossal Titans, the lines of their formation like the walls had expanded. And made sure all ships had sunk. Burning atop the water. It's a pitiful sight. Those who could swim and make it to shore. Are better off not. Most likely not. Burning in the lit oil. Reduced to a half cooked corpse from the steam of the Colossal Titans. Them marching onward, row after row, to destroy Marley and all else in their path. Their strength saved up for this hour. As they annihilate through the night, and will continue on through the day should anything and anyone be left.

The vast world Eren had wanted to see, would any of that remain after he's destroyed all their enemies?

That is the fact of the matter.

Why Levi had made his choice.

Kill.

Or be killed.

Levi is familiar with this cruelty of their world.

Forced from one hell, into another.

It's endless.

Even so.

"You sure this was the right choice?" Levi knows he doesn't have any right to ask that of Eren. He just can't bear that the only sound in the silence is the screaming. 

"Yes," Eren replies to him, as they sit together on the dark shore. Waiting for any enemies that slip through. So far it looks like it ain't gunna happen. Levi figures if he eventually dozes off from this nightmare, the remnants of the Survey Corps will figure it out. They'll have to since the walls can no longer protect them. The Eldians of Paradi. Truly the Devils of Paradi.

Levi glances over to Eren. Even with the markings on his face, the after effect bearings of the titan shifting. He looks to Levi like no devil. His green eyes, passive as they appear to be on the surface, shimmering beneath it- a passion that enraptures Levi to this day. It's a shoddy reason, the actual reason when he doesn't put on airs. As to why it's him who is here next to Eren right now, watching the world burn. Levi had wanted to know. Even after everything. All this. His answer is unchanged. Eren is painfully beautiful.

Levi reaches to touch Eren's face, his hand stopping short. A few fingers barely flexing out, in mid motion. As Eren resumes speaking. Not bothering to grant him even a glance.

"I intend to retrieve the rest of the Great Titans. And once they are returned to the Founder, there will be no need of a King Fritz or a Queen Reiss."

In other words, Historia and her child can live a normal life... if a normal life can be had after this.

Levi's hand falls to rest on his knee.

Levi knows Eren had not done this just for them, or his friends, or himself. He had done this.

For all of humanity that had once resided behind the walls... right?

Levi's eyes widen a touch at Eren's absolute affirmation. He'd understood Eren intended to kill the enemy before the enemy came to wipe them out- it necessary. Even that being so. It's a sin too large for one person to bear. A sin Eren shouldn't have to bear. But because of that King, that damn King who couldn't-

"I thought you wanted Zeke to become King," Levi says, watching the waves come in, wash out.

"I did," Eren says, "But Zeke did not want to become King. Instead he wanted to stay with me. In a way... he is _my_ King. Mine and mine alone."

Levi isn't following, wondering if the stink of the salty ocean air is making him slow.

"The hell does that mean?"

Levi tries not to let the mellow amusement in Eren's voice, unnerve him. As Eren explains to him.

"He could have consumed me and inherited the Founder. Instead he chose for me to consume him. Because in the end he wanted to protect me, not himself. I wish I had believed in him sooner."

The continuous crash of the waves, a lull in their conversation.

"Well, it's alright now. He understands," Eren says, almost offhandedly. Like it's not really important to tell Levi any of which he had.

Levi turns from the bright stars, daring another glance at Eren's beautiful face. His beautiful eyes.

Those eyes staring right at him for once.

It catches Levi off guard, to have the tables turned on him like this.

"...shit... what-"

Suddenly it's hard to move.

Then.

He can't move his body.

Not at all.

"There was another thing," Eren starts, crawling over to where Levi is sitting. Unable to rise or get away. Eren reaches to stroke Levi's cheek. (Dusting off the sand first of course). Murmuring to himself, "Oh stop it, don't be like that Zeke."

Eren settles down, sitting on the backs of his ankles. At his knees.

"About Zeke... he actually asked me if I was using the Founder's abilities to control you since you're of the Ackerman line. I told him you made the decision to follow me on your own... but now I'm curious if you really did. The only way for me to know in all truth is if you come inside me too. That's something you've always wanted, right Captain Levi?"

Levi can neither agree nor deny.

Eren explaining further, abashed.

"...I haven't been completely honest with you sir. I must return the Great Titans to the Founder... but I also must return the Ackerman line to the Founder as well. We're all connected."

Eren's face leans close to his, his gaze setting to swallow Levi up. His breath fans across Levi's mouth. Eren's lips look full and soft. The marking across his face pale red, his lips darkly pink. Levi finding for all his strength and experience, he cannot resist.

"How about it Captain? Didn't you want to touch me?"

That spark that had granted him that edge, also binds him.

As if time has stopped for him, on him.

Eren who is not Eren who is Eren who is not who he seems,

Who is

Goes on to say.

"I am her. She is me. I am you. You are me."

Levi's fingers reach, quivering, to gradually touch Eren's cheek. His hand cupping it.

Eren smiles at Levi warmly, his lush green eyes bright, "I see. So that's how it is sir?" 

A wonderful

Soon the only sound along the shore, are the waves again.

Their conversation has reached its end.

\--

Eren sits in the sand.

Morning light stretching out along the horizon. Cut through in places by trailing smoke of the collapsing civilizations beyond this island. Their Paradis.

"You thought I wasn't going to absorb him and you'd have to share me with him? Stupid big brother, I told you not to be so jealous," Eren is chiding Zeke as he takes the wet sand. Shaping it in his hands, he rebuilds the walls.

Replying to the voice in his head.

"What? I should have been more honest with Captain Levi? I'm surprised to hear you say that... true, I could have told him that you did not become King of the Walls so I could become the God of this World, but he probably wouldn't believe me. Since he's returned to the light, he knows now. I think it worked out."

He fashions the towers, they're exactly like Zeke's because Zeke is actually building them for him through his hands.

Eren delighted by the sight, their castle in the sand exactly as it'd been on the other side.

After admiring their handiwork.

Together they walk along the shore.

Eren picks up a pink conch shell, washing it in the bloodied sea.

Holding it to his ear so they can both better hear from the distance, traveled over the waves, through the wind.

The resonance of a long awaited symphony.

Dedicated to their dream come true.

Their great escape.


End file.
